Faded (A Harry Styles Fanfiction)

Chapter Three

After my classes yesterday I went straight to bed. Mostly because I was just emotionally drained. When I woke up, it was 8 AM so I got ready for my Math lecture again and just put a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt on. My hair was in a ponytail and my brown hair went just beyond my shoulders. After putting on my makeup, I shoved my stuff in my bag and started on my way to class. The chilly morning air felt good compared to my stuffy room. I felt myself smiling from remembering Harry trying to guide me straight and I realized how dumb I must look smiling to myself so I quickly put on a poker face and walked the rest of the way to class.

When I walked in a majority of people were already here but no one had taken my normal seat. I walked up and sat down and tried to get comfortable. I didn't pay attention to the people coming in and pulled out my notebook and pencil. I propped my foot up on the seat in front of me and tried my best to make a hard writing surface.

As the professor walked in he announced the topic of today's lecture and I tried to keep up as much as I could, my handwriting almost illegible. He talked fast and the only time I would be able to catch up would be the short pauses he took so he could write something on the large black board.

About 45 minutes into the lecture, a piece of paper hit the back of my head, but I pretended to not notice. Then, another landed on my notebook, but I just pushed it off and kept writing. Suddenly, a large wad of paper hit me in the back of the head and I quickly turned around and glared up at him. He had the same cocky smile on his face but I was pissed. I grabbed my bag and stood on my chair and climbed over each row until I got to him and sat next to him. He still seemed amused.

"Hey feisty Finley," he teased which made my blood boil.

"Stop bothering me and pay attention to the lecture. You're wasting not only your time but also mine," I shot back, clenching my jaw. The smile on his face disappeared but came back moments later.

"Then don't lie to me," his smile almost getting to me. I wanted to apologize but why did I have to apologize? He was the one that wanted me to go, and I didn't want to go.

"Why does it matter if I didn't go?"

"Because I wanted to see you," my heart fluttered at his words but I pushed the butterflies away.

"Yeah, okay sure," I said sarcastically turning away from his stare. I wonder if he's ever lost a staring contest.

"I did, actually. I told you that yesterday," he reminds me. He did say something like that but I was almost positive he was lying.

"Are you done?" I said emotionless turning back to face him. The smile on his face really disappeared this time as he broke our eye contact for the first time.

I never moved away from him, but as the professor dismissed us, I tried as fast as I could to get away. Why do I always do this? I push everyone away who might care about me. But he didn't care. How could he, he doesn't even know me. He didn't stop me from bolting out of the room. He didn't try again to talk to me, but just seeing his smile one more time would have made me crack. The walls that I'd spent years building up would have crashed down with just one smile. The dimples that appeared at the corners of his mouth, deepening with each word he spoke. I put my headphones in my ear and tried to drown out everything around me. I fast walked to my dorm and changed into my running clothes and walked back down to the path I always run on. Instead of running to a specific point, I just turned on my music and ran as fast as I could after stretching for a minute. I pushed and pushed, trying to forget the anger that was consuming me. Pumping my arms faster and faster I kept trying to increase my pace. I ignored everyone else around me as my breathing increased and my muscles burned. Sweat was already trailing down my forehead and back.