mauve lilith

Never again

She stalked back and forth in her room after ordering the servant to leave. Just for precautions. She had sat on the seat of the empress for 14years, she knew not even the closest friend/servant could be trusted.

She reoganized her memories of the past. She was from a rich, noble and ancient family called the Hou's

She was spoiled and proud, 15, and fell desperately in love with the crown prince at first sight. She had used all her power to get closer to him. She even begged her father to use his position as a second ranked official.

She thought she was the most beautiful and talented women around, she thought if she got a single chance she would be able to catch his heart.

But what she didn't know.... was that while she was thinking about the crow prince, he did not have pesky things like love and marriag in his mind. He was more concerned on protecting the throne from all the other princes and countries. 

What's more is that, her father was secretly planning on killing the crown prince and the empress....

Her father had decided to attatch his daughter to the crown prince to spy on him, and the innocent little her, who thought of nothing but having a happily ever after with the prince was cruely used as a pawn by her father.

After that, everything was a mess.

At first the crown prince regarded her as just a small fly, She was beautiful, talented, graceful and fitting but that was what all the other noble daughters were too. So she didn't stand out.

Then, after she began to tell her father what the crownprince did all day, thinking that her father wanted to arrange a marriage. But the reporting was eventually was found out by the crownprince after a big accident..

After that, the crownprince treated her harshly and cruely. SHe later found out that in the incident, the lady that crown prince wanted to make her his empress had died, and also that her father had planned to kill the crownprince from the information he got from her.

She was treated harshly and cruely by the crown prince, she never knew why but her heart still remained faithful.

After years and years of struggling (or more like begging), at the age of 19, she was able to become the empress and the official wife of the crown prince who became the emperor.

Tragicly though, he never looked at her. Instead he shunned her and insulted her in front of everyone. It felt as though he was stabbing her over and over with a metal stick and she was letting him.

He took in hundreds of concubines and never looked at her.

Those concubines looked down on her, tried to kill her numerous times and because of this she had injuries and scars all over her body.

In the end she used monsterous ways to finally get the emporer to look at her. She learned the way of the assassin, politics, soilder, official, monk, and everything she could get a hand on so she could get his attention.

She finally did by killing of one of his favorite concubine who was pregnant, but that was nothing, she had had killed more than 40 concubines and servants by then.

But what finally stopped her fight was his words, his words which were so cruel and harsh.

"Why do you keep trying? DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THAT NOBODY WOULD LOVE A MONSTER LIKE YOU?! YOU, MY DEAR EMPRESS IS A HORRIBLE NIGHTMARE AND A CRUEL DREAM FOR ALL THE PEOPLE IN THIS PALACE, ONE DAY I SHALL POUR ALL THE HEAVEN'S WRATH ON YOU AND YOU WILL PAY FOR ALL YOU HAVE DONE" and that was final.

She realized how cruel this world was, and how the only thing she had wanted from life was never hers from the beginning.

SO after  that night she was kicked out to the cold palace, and that was the same day she found out she was pregnant.

However the fight had gone out of her, only the bitter and empty her remained.

In the end she let the black shadow(or the emporer's body gaurd) to kill her.