The Secret Ingredient to Falling in Love

Chapter 10. Tears Of The Heartbroken.

How did he get those?! My mind immediately races back to moments he's been in my house. Not once did I leave him alone in my room while he was over to work on our art project. I don't know how he could have gotten it.

I think to when we went to the mall, but my mind comes up blank. I don't remember him even coming into my house, I don't even remember much from yesterday morning. Cursed is my stupid brain, and it's stupid remembering skills. I lean against the fridge door and slid down, my eyes locked onto the picture of my preteen choice of her first set of bra and underwear. It had been a stupid choice now that I look back. I had just started puberty and my mom wanted me to get some stuff, so we went out one day and that's what I chose. Why do I even still have those stupid things when they don't even fit?!

I exit out of Zander's messages and go over to Gina's. My thumbs hover over the keyboard, itching to type the text but also holding back. She would only freak out then kill him. And I'm not even exaggerating.

I sigh softly and lean my head against the fridge, my eyes closed as I think of the many possible ways of embarrassment coming tomorrow. He could hang it on my locker, put it on the steps of the school, give it around to other guys who will start to creep on me and call me names. As if I don't deal with that enough already.

Opening my eyes I look back down at my phone and go back to the message from Zander. I push my phone away from me and get up, racing upstairs to my bed. The covers welcome me wholeheartedly, their warmth wrapping around me like a cradle of safety. For a second I forget about everything and just focus on the safe feeling of the blankets wrapped around me, how it would feel for someone to wrap their arms around me like this, to hold me in such a way that makes me feel as safe and secure as these blankets.

I shake my head at the thought. Everything rushes back at once, causing me to groan and roll over as I feel the headache start to form. What could he possibly want from me? How could he do this? Just when you think someone is decent, they turn around and do this. I feel a tear slid down my cheek, and before I know it, many more start to follow. It's stupid really, all this because of just a stupid picture. I mean like, how can he even prove it was mine?

That's the funny thing, nobody will care if it's true or not. They'll just act on it anyways. The tears flow harder and harder until I'm full on sobbing, wrapped up in my blanket, my face buried in my pillow to catch all my tears. I eventually start to fall asleep, my face sticky and wet. My cheeks and eyes probably red, but who cares. The last tear falls and rolls down my cheek onto the pillow. My eyes shut tiredly, my body unconsciously curling up with my blankets, gripping them in my hands to get that safe feeling back into my grasp. Slowly, I fall asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~

I'm walking into school, books clutched to my chest, head down, and my sweatshirt hoodie up to hide my barely controlled red hair. I pass by people but they don't spare me a second glance. Good, I don't want them to either. I make it to my locker and am surprised when I don't see Gina there waiting for me. Must be in class already. I shut my locker and look to my right, a group of girls I haven't seen before are looking right at me. We make eye contact then they look away, giggling behind their hands and not so discreetly pointing my way.

I put my head down again and push towards my first class. My knuckles turning white from clutching my books so hard against my chest. The whispers are more noticeable now, people turning away when I walk by to talk to their friends and laugh, girls giving me snide looks before rolling their eyes and looking away. It's all so noticeable.

I make it to my first class and rush to my seat. I sit down in the back and put my head down on the desk. I peek up as I hear more students fill the room. They glance at me, either laughing or rolling their eyes. Zander comes into the room and takes a seat in his usual seat. He doesn't look at me or even in my direction. That's odd . . . Thought he said he wanted to talk to me today?