It (#Wattys2016)

cure to being weird (thankfully, there is none)

I'll confess.

I'm an oddball, a blot of black food colouring spilled into a glass of pure, white milk.

I'll be blamed for

Tainting the very foundation of innocence for my apparent crime of being different

Until they realize what they're saying is actually

BULLSHIT.

It still tastes the same.

I'll confess.

If all of you are a forest of blues and pink and greens,

I'll be the dancing black and white fairy, doing ballet to hip-hop music,

Screaming at the top of my lungs,

Knowing every word to the song, yet

Changing the lyrics anyway, simply because.

Not everything needs a reason.

I'll confess.

I used to be ashamed.

I used to hate being the last puzzle piece that was too large to fit in the hole,

To be a piece of some random Roald Dahl novel lost within

All these jigsaw fragments for Naruto and friends.

I used to hide behind my thick, beige blankets, crying silently into my damp pillow as I wondered:

When had it all gone wrong?

But then, I'll remember that young three year old me climbing to his feet,

Glancing at the clear, polished mirror thrice my height,

"When I grow up, I wanna be weird."

And so I did.

I embraced books instead of bugs,

Read novels instead of subtitles,

Spoke nonsense instead of logic,

Wished for peace instead of PS2 games,

Wrote stories instead of graffiti and

I survived.

I used to hate being the odd one out,

Being the lone, awkward freak twiddling his thumbs in the corner,

The crowd attraction in terms of

Jagged words and crumpled papers,

And non-creative nicknames that

Served to irritate rather than violate.

I used to long for tomorrows.

I used to hope that

By some random chance, I'd magically just be normal the next day until

I finally realized.

I'd be the same manipulative monsters who taught me to shape my life.

And with every last breath in my body, I look to the heavens,

An infinite times multiple my height and I wish:

"When I die old, I hope I'm still weird."

And this time, there was no regret.

A/N: Hey everyone! It's been a long time,  I know. 

I've been caught up with my subjects this semester as well as a lot of other activities. And this includes slam poetry too, haha, which is pretty interesting.

Anyway, I'd like to apologize to everyone for not updating for so long for both Bittersweet and It. I have no idea when I'll be able to publish poems back on track but I hope everyone understands.

Anyway, this is dedicated to cleverwren who's been an absolutely big help to me as of late. I love them to the moon and back for everything they've done! :) Once again, thank you so much.