"Did you kiss her?" my mom asks, my eyes flickering up at her. I just run my hand through my hair as my leg bounces, jitters running through me.
"No. I-I can't," I remind her, my anxiety always getting the best of me. But Carly is helping me. I can tell she isn't bothered like other people are. I need time and space; people overwhelming me. I've been scarred for life because of my childhood.
"She likes you. I can tell," she grins, leaning against the counter across from me. I look into her eyes, her words grasping my attention.
"What?" She just smiles and grabs my arm, rubbing it to sooth me.
"You both look at each other with full, dedicated attention. She smiles at you and looks so happy. You both like each other and it's so obvious. I want you to tell her that," she says, and I find myself flushing.
"I-I have," I grin, and she gasps. She broadly smiles and I nervously chuckle, her happiness making me so embarrassed.
"Oh my gosh, Harry. How wonderful! What did she say?" she asks, my hands covering my face. Oh my gosh, I've never said these things to my mom. I've never needed to.
"She said...she said she likes me too," I recall, Carly's beautiful face looking at me so softly when she did so. But she was hurt, and I was so worried for her. I had never been very strong, and thinking about being with Carly made me think I need to work out. I went to the gym and I was sore for days, but if I get stronger, I could be with Carly.
"Oh, Harry, I'm so proud and so happy," she beams, rushing to hug me. I groan and then Harper runs into the room, her eyes taking in mom hugging me.
"Whatcha doing?" she asks, mom looking over at her.
"Harry and Carly like each other," mom says, and Harper smiles up at me.
"Harry has a girlfriend," she squeals and I roll my eyes, but I'm unable to fight the smile that overcomes my lips.
"Alright. Let me go," I chuckle, finally freeing myself from my mom. I walk upstairs and I hear Harper follow me, my feet walking into my room.
"Harry, are you going to be with Carly?" she asks, my body turning to look at her. I open my arms and she hugs me, my arms holding her close.
"I want to be. But I don't know if I can," I tell her, her head nodding.
"You're amazing Harry. She needs to know that," she says, way too smart for her age. My sister is a miracle child, but none-the-less my best friend. I helped raise her, and that's a miracle in and of itself. My anxiety is lost with Harper.
We go and sit on my bed and we talk about her book, then I start tickling her. She is super cute and I love hanging out with her. She helps me relax, Just as Carly is helping me.
My phone starts to ring and I look at it, seeing Carly's name. I smile and answer it, telling Harper to go to her room.
"Hello," I say, waiting to hear her talk.
"Hi Harry. You want to do the paper tonight?" Carly asks, and I smile. She wants to hang out with me and I still can't believe it.
"Sure. Where do you, um, want to meet up?" I ask, knowing it's all over the place.
"You can come to the café again. I'm craving a scone," she says, and I smile. I agree and hang up, Harper running back into my room. She jumps in excitement and I blush, her body jumping onto me.
"You're going on a date," she smiles, hugging me. I smile up at her, and I kiss her cheek.
"I'm doing homework. And so should you," I say, her head shaking. I carry her into her room and set her on her bed, tickling her.
"You better be asleep by the time I get home," I smile, her hands grabbing mine.
"You have fun," she says, my head nodding. I kiss her forehead and start to pack up, telling my mom where I'm going.
I make my way to the café and I find my cheeks burning when I see Carly. She's studying already and I walk towards her, her head turning just as I make it to the table.
"Hi," she grins, my body sitting across from her.
"H-Hey," I smile, looking at her closely. She's wearing her hair down today and it looks really good. She really is beautiful.
We get started on our essays and the two of us read through literature as if it's second nature. I've never realized anyone could love books as much as me, but meeting a girl like that...it makes my world open up. I've secluded myself so much.
"Be with me always - take any form - drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! It is unutterable! I can not live without my life! I can not live without my soul!" Carly reads, highlighting over the passage in Wuthering Heights.
"I think that correlates to the theme of grief. It exemplifies the need for another and how they became what the other needs. Their other half," she talks it through, my head nodding in agreement. We use the quote and she keeps reading and looking at quotes, my fingers typing up my essay.
"Oh I found one," I say, her head nodding. I read the passage from The Great Gatsby, using the quote of how Jay looked at Daisy as if she were everything he had. I read the entire passage without stuttering or any nerves, confident with my finding.
Then I look up at her and her lips are parted, her eyes fascinated by me. It makes me nervous and I run my hand through my hair, her eyes only blinking but she never looks away.
"W-Was that...okay?" I ask, her lips curving. She moves her elbow onto the table and rests her chin on her hand, her eyes focused on me.
"You read beautifully," she tells me and I flush, her hand reaching over and grabbing mine. I hold hers and she smiles at me, making me nervous.
"I-I just...read what I though w-would work," I say, and she smiles bigger. Just looking at her makes me so nervous she's going to find me boring and just leave. She's so out of my league.
"It does, but shit you have the best voice," she grins and I blush profusely, her hand lifting and poking my cheek. She always pokes my dimples but I don't mind with her. She likes me and I like her; something that still shocks me.
~~~
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