The Story Book
(This is another deleted chapter from RMA. It’s supposed to be the #10 of Tam & Ivan’s To Do List while the Motorbike ride was #9. But since I jumbled the scenes, #9 & #10 were out of the list. I already had the draft of the scenes in my notebook but I can no longer cope up with the series of events when I jumbled them. Plus it would only prolong the story so this part was deleted—even though I didn’t want to. This was supposed to be part of chapter 020, right after Tam “boyfriend zoned” Ivan.)
ヽ(○´∀')ﾉ♪ Song for this chapter: How I Go by Yellowcard (I love this song!) & The Story of my Life by One Direction
(Ivan’s POV)
“I am not everything you thought that I would be. But every story I have told is part of me…I leave you now but you have so much more to do. And every story I have told is part of you.”
~How I Go; Yellowcard
September 10, 2012
You know what, I knew myself as a very sadistic person. Well, I can hurt anybody and break anybody as easy as breaking out of our house. But one thing I have realized is that even though I am the one who is capable of hurting anyone without a reason, I am not immune to feel hurt.
I am not depressed. I am not demoralized. And most especially I am not hurt—just because Tamara boyfriend zoned me.
I was supposed to meet her today since I make it a habit to be her Mr. Everyday. But I ignored the gut wrenching feeling of running towards their house today. I refuse to feel addicted to her. I refuse to feel that I needed her. I refuse to feel that I am crazy about her. But the more I tell the lie mantra to my subconscious, the more I feel wretched. Dreaded to the fact that she turned me down. What if she doesn’t want me in her life? What if she wanted someone better? What if she realized that I wasn’t the one for her?
(ι´Д｀)ﾉ Well that would be the death of you. My subconscious tells me.
I angrily threw the aerosol at my graffiti and the can broke into several pieces, smudging my work all over. Stupid.
Why wouldn’t she want me? I ask myself that ludicrous question even though no one’s gonna answer it even my subconscious. A movement then distracted me from my peripheral vision. I turned to see Tamara watching me.
“What are you doing here?” I asked her, rather roughly.
She flinches. I knew she was thinking why she was there and why I was throwing my blip at her.
“I’m sorry, I forgot.”
I grinned and I shook my head. Just classic Tamara McLethe. I kicked the fragment aerosol out of my way as I stocked the remaining ones back in the box.
“Are you mad?”
“No, I’m pissed.” I snapped.
“Oh. With who?”
I scoffed sharply. You is what I wanted to say. But that would drive me insane. So I focused my anger at the aerosols as I threw them back harshly in the box.
And then maybe, by some miracle she realized that it was her.
“Ah—oh.” I turn to her and she’s biting her lower lip. I stood up and she takes a step back. “M-m-maybe I should go.”
“No,” I said. “Stay.”
щ(゜ロ゜щ) What? My subconscious beams at me.
She looks down at her knotted hands and then right back at me. “I think you should cool your head first. Maybe you need to—”
YOU ARE READING
Remind Me Again
Teen FictionWhat happens when she's your Juliet but you're not her Romeo? Ivan Patricks is that one boy who would always have TROUBLE written on his forehead. He is having the time of his life... until he meets Tamara McLethe. A seemingly cute girl, just mildly...
