The Worst Crown The Empire Fanfic Ever

Part 10

"I'm pregnant!" I cried out. Dave immediately paused the television, and everyone looked at me in shock.

"What?" Dave said, standing up dramatically. I didn't mind, I was just glad to share the news. "Alix said that she's pregnant, were you not listening?" Andrew questioned. Dave turned back and squinted at him. 

"I'm unfollowing you on twitter for that," Dave snapped sassily. Andrew squinted as well. I could tell drama was about to go down. "You're unfollowing me on twitter because I'm a better listener than you?" Andrew said, putting his hands on his hips.

Brent began chugging his regular alcohol.

"Well," Andrew continued, "I have a problem with that." He then stood up. I rubbed my stomach, knowing it now contained a fetus.

"Why don't you just block him like you do with everybody else?" Brandon asked. Everyone glared at him. "Blocked," Andrew replied.

"Are we not acknowledging the fact that Alix is pregnant?" Dave said, reminding us.

"Oh, I almost forgot," I replied. Maybe I'd remember later on that I was carrying a child in my stomach. Children are so not rememberable.

"Well, I guess I'm a dad now," Dave sighed, then proceeded to rub my stomach in a drunken fashion. It was not romantic at all. "Actually," I interrupted, "Brandon is the father."

Dave immediately disappeared into thin air. "What the snip snap crickle crack fannypack quarterback?" I swore. Everyone acted casually, as if nothing had occurred.

"Oh, that's okay," Hayden explained. He patted me on the shoulder. "He's just going to disappear for a few months with no further explanation." I nodded. That seemed fair and not eventful at all.

"Well, looks like I'm a father," Brandon said. Suddenly, The Raven strut into the room. "How'd you get in here?" Brent asked. We all ignored his irrelevant comment.

"I'm the father," The Raven hissed, pushing Brandon aside. We all gasped. Not even I knew that we were in love. "Oh right, I forgot," I said. "Just like how we all forgot Benn's death," Andrew pointed out. Again, he was ignored.

Before any further action could be taken, Hayden removed a gun from an disclosed location in his pants and shot at The Raven. It hit him, and he hit the floor. "God, not another boring death," The Raven groaned. He then died.

"Looks like I'm the dad again," Brandon sighed. I shrugged. At least it wasn't Brent.

And we all lived happily ever...

"Freeze!" Shouted Brendan, rushing into the room with a loaded firearm. "Why do you have a gun?" I asked immediately. "Because we're in Texas," Andrew replied.

"I'm the father, you sell-out fools!" Brendan declared boldly. Brandon shoved him harshly, and the two began fighting for my affection. It was too intense for my fragile, female eyes.

Hayden unsheathed this gun yet again, and shot Brendan dead. There were two dead bodies on the floor now, but that was okay, because at least the relevant members of the band were alive.

The End, I guess.