{ Chara x Papyrus }

Chapter 10) How I Fell

Chara (Flashback) POV

     I didn't realize how bad killing everything I saw was until later. I just wanted Asgore to feel better, and prove I'm a good person. When I think about it now, it sounds stupid. Why would you kill everything to help someone not feel pressured? If anything it'll make them more stressed.
     Soon enough, killing became easy, an addiction... It wasn't about Asgore anymore. I felt like I could take on the anything if I tried, I felt powerful. Everyone else was weak and useless, they were never there for me anyways, so what does it matter? All the monsters here treated me differently because I was human, makes me wonder why they even bothered with the surface.
       But the way they treated me... Was similar to my life up there. Humans treated me like a demon just because I was different, because of my eyes. Is red some kind of unnatural color!? How would they feel if I treated them like that. They shunned me, just because of my discoloration, it's stupid. It helped me notice how humans really behave... Evil, judgmental, power crazy.... I never wanted to be like them. I hated them so much that I don't even consider myself one of them.
     The monsters similar behavior made my insides burn. Is there nowhere to go? To find someone who's willing to treat me like I belong? Those stupid monsters... I'll show them the true meaning of this world! Hatred, suffering, death.... That's all I could say about it, and that's what I showed them. No mercy... Not here!
     Frisk however.... She was so kind hearted, showing mercy all the time to such undeserving creatures. This is why I always took over but... I stopped because of him. The only monster who refused to judge me by my looks or race, he believed in me. That's why I couldn't live with myself after having his death being by my hands. I chose to never reset for genocide again. I just sat in darkness, the creeping feeling... Of wanting to erase such a pitiful excuse for a world always tested me, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I could hurt him... Papyrus, ever again.
     Frisk was able to complete her pacifist run, and used Alphys to revive Asriel and I. Because Asriel had absorbed my soul, we were connected. But I was too annoyed by his forgiving ways, that I left my dark soul in him, making the monster he used to be. I flew around as a spirit until I found Frisk. Anyways, I never wanted to live again after my experiences. So all I felt was rage towards Frisk, all this time she'd resisted my genocidal ways and refused to erase this world. I never once had the option to destroy it and remake it anew, then take her soul in the process to destroy every last world this universe had to offer. I wanted to take out all my anger on her, and kill her once and for all. Not just take over her mind, ending her life and taking that DETERMINED soul for myself.

Frisk: Chara! Think about the choice your making! Why are you doing this!?

Chara: You live your life in bliss and happiness.. You'd never understand how I felt, if there's nothing left to feel... Then nobody else will suffer *Runs at Frisk with a knife*

F:  *Dodges* You're making people suffer by your actions, and you alone can't destroy the whole universe! Think about who your hurting that would never judge you! Toriel, Asriel, Asgore, Undyne, Alphys, Sans, me, Papyrus...

C: *Stops*

F: T-they all care about you, even believed that you could do better...

C: *Tearing up* Believed in me...? My flashbacks of killing him replayed in my head. If I destroyed everything, I'd never see him again.

F: Look... I know you don't really care about yourself... But haven't you ever wanted to be happy?

C: Y-yes... But... I don't think I can. Just make everyone else happy without me.

F: No *Walks over and hugs Chara, taking her knife in the process* Heh... Papyrus always told me that anyone could be happy... Even if they don't believe in themselves, they can have others who'll always be there for them.

C: *Smiles while crying* O-ok Frisk, I'm putting my trust in you though... And in him...

     I let Frisk befriend me and I do live happily right now... With him too. He's the same as he's always been. A believer, trustworthy... Someone who'd never judge a book by it's cover. I fell in love with that part of him... But someone like me doesn't deserve him, so I distanced myself. But he keeps coming closer, it's hard not to hug him and stay in his arms forever.
Papyrus.... If you're listening...
Is it bad that I fell for you?