Seventh Year

The Infirmary

    I watch silently as Madam Pomfrey shoos my friends out of the infirmary. She turns to me and gives me an apologetic look. "I had to. You need peace and quiet, even if you don't want it. Having that done to you... It must be stressful. May I see it again, to get a better look at it?" I nod and hold my arms out. "Please close your eyes." I do as she says, too tired to object. All my crying has made my eyes hurt.
    "Sirius told me his suspicions. It seems he was right. I'm sorry (M/N). There is nothing I can do about this. It almost looks like lycanthrope scratches. Those are nearly impossible to heal. Did you happen to hear the words Malfoy used?" I shake my head.
    "It was a silent spell, Madam Pomfrey."
    "Curious. I didn't think any silent spell could be this powerful." I can hear the frown in her voice, and I feel bad for not being of any help. "Don't make that face. I know exactly what you are thinking. You feel like you could have helped more, don't you? Don't think that. If he didn't speak then there is nothing you could do to help."
    I nod silently. I hear her sigh as she tells me I can open my eyes. I open them slowly to see her wrapping bandages around my arms. I feel a slight stinging pain and realize she must have put something on them to heal me, even though it's basically helpless. I smile slightly. "Thank you, Madam Pomfrey."
    "I don't promise it will help. Like I said, it seems impossible to heal. But I will try my best." I smile gratefully at her and my eyes slip closed. "Rest. When you wake up I will tell your friends they can see you. I know they are worried about you." I want to thank her once again, but I fall asleep before I can.
    I wake up to James' voice. I turn my head in the direction of his voice and he falls silent. I open my eyes quickly, only to see nothing. "James?" I whisper, wondering if I had only been hearing things. I shake my head and roll back onto my back, thinking that maybe I had heard his voice echo in from the halls.
    "Are you awake?" I hear Madam Pomfrey's voice and nod, not wanting to speak. She bustles over and makes sure my bandages are still on. I smile at her concern, thankful for her motherly attention. I sit up quickly, a thought suddenly coming to mind.
    "Madam Pomfrey? You haven't told my parents what happened yet, have you?" I ask nervously. She looks at me, slightly shocked.
    "We have owled them, but have not gotten a response yet." I internally sigh in relief. My parents never pay any attention to the owls. I look at her pleadingly.
    "If they do not respond, please do not send another or do something else to alert them. I don't want them to know." I bow my head, knowing I will get questioned.
    "Why do you not want them to know you have been hurt?" She asks gently, placing her hand on my shoulder.
    "If they thought this was a dangerous school then I would have never been allowed to come here. If they learn I have been hurt then they will remove me from the wizarding world for good. I love magic. I don't want to be removed." I say quietly, not able to look at her. She squeezes my shoulder gently.
    "I will see what Albus has to say about this. But I am sure he will understand. We could not stand having you taken away from the wizarding world. You are a very talented young man." She smiles kindly at me, and I blush at her words.
    "Thank you, Madam Pomfrey. That means a lot to me." I smile back at her.
    "Enough talk. I will tell your friends you are awake." She leaves my side and I silently thank her for her kindness. After a minute or so, a worried Lily charges in and hugs me tightly. I hug her back just as tightly, knowing she has probably been pacing in her worry for me. I feel a pang of guilt cross my heart as she lets go of me.
    "I'm so sorry Lily. I should have asked Madam Pomfrey to let you in."
    "Don't you dare say that! You needed the rest. Don't feel bad for something you needed." I nod and she grabs my hands, pulling them close so she can inspect the bandages. She sighs, hugging me once again. "I wish Severus were here for you. What got into him?" I shake my head, tears pricking at my eyes. "I'm sorry! I shouldn't have brought him up!"
    "Lily dearest, let him breathe. You're smothering him." I hear James say, causing Lily to pull away from me.
    "Sorry (M/N)! I didn't realize. I was just so worried." I smile at her concern.
    "It's okay Lily. I know you mean the best. Even if you do smother me." I laugh to let her know I'm joking. She looks at me seriously.
    "I know you are hurting from Severus. Don't pretend to be okay." My smile falters as her words get to me. She looks at me knowingly. "Everyone out. (M/N) needs time to himself, and he doesn't like anyone to see him cry."
    "But we're his friends!" I hear Sirius protest.
    "And he seemed comfortable enough around me earlier." I hear Remus whisper. All I hear from Peter is a squeak as he obeys Lily's orders. She quickly whispers something in James' ear and he nods.
    "Do take care of him, Lily dearest." James says as he saunters out of the room, pulling the other two along with him.
    "Of course I will, Jamesie boo!" She shouts happily after him. I smile at how in love they are, despite the tears threatening to fall. Lily pulls me close and I let them free, crying onto her shoulder. "Shh (M/N), there has to be something to this. He does love you, I just know it." I nod slowly and wipe away my tears. "Are you better now?"
    "A little bit. But don't let me hold you back. Go be with James. I'll be fine, I promise."
    "If you're sure." She seems a bit hesitant.
    "I am. I promise I'll be okay. Go have fun." I smile reassuringly. She gives me a quick goodbye hug and a promise to be back later before taking off. I close my eyes to calm myself, but it just seems to enhance the feeling of my tears sliding down my cheeks.
    "Look at the special one, staying in the infirmary for a couple of silly little scars." I snap my eyes open to see the person I least want to see right now.
    "Malfoy. What do you want?"
    "I just wanted to see how baffled Madam Pomfrey was at my little joke. Let me see your wrists." He pulls my arms roughly toward him and yanks the bandages off. I wince in pain as he inspects the words. "Good, they are still there. See you later, Mudblood." He laughs cruelly and points to my arms as he leaves. I stare at the words and continue to cry.
    "Maybe he's right. Maybe I deserve the title 'Mudblood.'" I stare at the cuts in my own handwriting that label me exactly that and sigh sadly, curling up to go back to sleep.