Slippery Slopes (Winterhaven Series - Vol. 1)

Chapter 50

"Maybe you should talk to Todd about your past." Nolan joined Drew behind the bar. "And ask him about his. The more you understand each other, the easier things will be."

Customers lined the bar, some of them wishing Drew and Nolan good luck in the pool tournament. They returned polite thank you's, their private conversation stalled as Nolan served up the beer orders while Drew handled the mixed drinks.

When they got a momentary break, Drew addressed Nolan's suggestion. "You're the first person I've even mentioned it to," he murmured. "It isn't something I want to dig up. Talking about it isn't going to change what happened or make me feel better about it."

"But it will help Todd understand your reservations." Nolan squeezed Drew's arm, his voice softening. "He likes you, Drew. A lot. And you like him, too. Maybe you both have some things to work through, but if you're both open and honest, so the two of you knows what the other is dealing with, then there will be fewer misunderstandings. Knowledge is power, in relationships as well. Help each other through your problems, instead of withdrawing from one another." His heart ached for Drew. The man had so much to offer, yet he held most of it back out of fear of having his heart broken again. Nolan was beginning to realize how fortunate he'd been throughout his life; awesome parents who supported him from the instant they brought him into their lives. No debilitating heartbreaks as obstacles to exploring new love. Minimal persecution for being gay. He was starting to see that his life was the "exception" rather than the "rule".

Sighing, Drew gazed down at Nolan, his eyes warm with affection. "I thought I was supposed to be the giver of good advice?"

Nolan smiled. "So you're saying my advice is good?"

"It's..." Drew blew out a low breath. "...not horrible. But..."

"No." Nolan gripped his arm and shook his head. "No buts. Just try it. I have a feeling that it would put Todd at ease if you opened up to him about your fears. And asked him to talk to you, too, about his own. It did me a world of good to know what Lane had gone through growing up. It goes a long way in helping me understand him and showing me that I need to be patient with him and give him the time he needs to come to terms with all this. And I'm sure that's all Todd needs; patience, understanding, and time. I see the way he looks at you. The boy is totally gone on you, baby."

Drew smiled, though it wavered as hurt filled his eyes. "So was Evan. To all intents and appearances. Sometimes the feelings...the love...isn't enough. There's something vulnerable, even fragile, in Todd. On the one hand, it makes me want to protect him. But I can't be there one hundred percent of the time. And..." he shrugged, an ache seeping into his voice. "I don't know if he can live this life when he has to stand alone on his own two feet. I'm not trying to criticize him or say he's weak. But for those who didn't grow up outside the closet, this can be a hard life to adjust to."

"I know," Nolan whispered. "All the more reason to give him the support he needs. Maybe you can't physically be with him all the time, but if you're within reach by phone or text or whatever, then he would know he's never really alone. Whenever he needs you, you're just a phone call or text message away."

Drew rubbed his eyes and exhaled heavily. "You make it sound so easy."

"Well, maybe it isn't easy," Nolan said. "But it doesn't have to be impossible, either." He rose up on his toes and kissed Drew's cheek. "Anything worth having, is worth working for. Worth fighting for." He stared into Drew's eyes. "Go ahead, try to tell me Todd isn't worth it." He smiled. "See if I believe you."

Groaning, Drew crushed him in a hug. "Smart ass little brat," he growled in his ear.

Nolan laughed and hugged him back. "You know I always come out on top."