Chapter 17: Like A Knife

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I'm not forcing you to, but if you can, please read the author's note in the end.

Unedited. Please proceed with caution. I don't have time to edit this.

Enjoy.

And yeah, the title is based on Secondhand Serenade's song.

*****

I don't have any idea about what's going on inside Hanji's mind, nor what plans they have as they invited Rein to sit on the couch. After knowing them for three years, I thought that I'm already good at reading them. But as I sat here, looking at Hanji and recognizing the glint in their eyes, the belief that I can read them that easy was flushed down the fucking toilet.

Hanji kept on staring at Rein, examining him with a scrutinizing gaze, like a scientist looking at a newly obtained specimen. Rein tried his best to look comfortable, to look unaffected, but seems to be failing based on the way he squirm lightly on his seat.

"So Rein..." Hanji started, catching both Rein's and my attention. It was dripping with amusement, although I can't fucking figure out the reason why they're so amused with this. "I didn't believe Eren at first when he told us that you look exactly like him but with you here, you two really do look alike."

Rein smiled at them. "Yeah, we often get that a lot."

Hanji nodded. "Who's older between you two?"

I rolled my eyes. "Hanji. They're twins."

Hanji turned their gaze at me and also rolls their eyes. "Someone came out first. That's the one who's older."

"Eren's older," Rein butted in. "Only by 5 minutes though."

"Really?" Rein nodded. "Who's more dominant between you two?"

"Hanji, why the fuck do you want to know that?" I glared at them but they, didn't give any attention to me, didn't even cast me a single glance and kept it fixed on Rein.

"Well, I can't exactly tell that but, Eren tends to get into a lot more fights while I tend to stay away from it as much as possible. He has a shorter fuse as it seems when it comes to anger."

Hanji nodded with a wide smile, seemingly happy with the information given to them. "Did you have any relationships before?"

The expression on Rein's face slowly changed into one that shows how uncomfortable the topic is to him. It obviously would, considering that it didn't go well.

"I had one, but she cheated on me. Caught her making out with some guy. We only lasted for a few months. Three or four months, I think?"

"That sucks."

"Well, I'm okay now. Besides, there's something much better for me here." Rein looked at me, smiling. Noticing it, Hanji cleared their throat, once again catching Rein's attention.

Hanji started talking again, but I didn't give them any attention, unable to even if I tried. My mind is too occupied with what Rein just said. Something much better for him? Is he pertaining to me?

I had noticed that he's been doing some little things, some advancement that I've seen before. The same way Eren acted when he started to make a move on me, before he officially asked me to date him. I should be glad about it, because somehow, he's living up to those words he had spoken and told me before they left for Germany, but I'm not.

I don't know what I feel about it.

I feel like I was torn. Because I really am. I'm still so fucking confused even though I kept on drilling the same thing in my mind fucking over and over again. I always told myself to just fucking move on and forget what happened, for Rein is here. The real Rein is here, the one that I've really been waiting for, and he's here to live up to the promise he left all those years ago.

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