False Pretense [EreRi/RiRen AU]

Chapter 21: We're Broken

You might hate me for this (as is you don't hate me already). Please proceed with caution.

This chapter is long, by the way.

Enjoy :)

*****

I am in no fucking way prepared for the event today—or should I say tonight—and I don't think that I will ever be.

Staring blankly at the ceiling with my limbs sprawled out on the bed taking up space as much as it can allow, I wallow at the silence in my room, a stark contrast to the war going on inside my head. It has been days since the last time the three of us met but the conversation between Rein and I never left me. He told me not to think about it too much, to not force myself and take my time, but I can't do that. Not with this desire to remove this heavy feeling weighing me down more and more every single fucking day that pass.

Another sigh left my lips, something that I've been doing for the umpteenth time today, and not even an hour had passed. I've been awake for an hour, but my body seems to not cooperate with me. My mind has been commanding it for fuck knows how many times already yet here I am, still laying on my black sheet covered bed. There seems to be a magnet holding my body down, keeping me in place and not allowing me to stand up. It's fine by me, mind and body still exhausted from the lack of sleep, and if it would help me to not be able to attend the event later tonight, I would be more than glad to stop trying to get up.

Life, however, have other plans for me. I knew it when I heard my phone alarmed, followed by the loud ringtone of someone messaging me. With a groan, I sat up, running my hand through my hair to fix my bed hair while reaching for my phone on my nightstand. Turning the alarm off, I went to open the message.

From: Hanji
06:32

Hey, Shorty! Christmas Eve is tonight! Do you have any plans?

I sighed. It wasn't really surprising to see their name first thing in the morning.

To: Hanji
6:35

Yes, Shitty Glasses. I'll be going out with Rein tonight.

I stood up and went to the bathroom to do my morning rituals. I didn't bother to stare at my reflection in the mirror knowing that I would look the same as I did last night, exhausted, as if I didn't have any blink of sleep.

Which is very much the truth.

After I relieved myself, washed my face and brushed my teeth, I went back to my room and took my phone, reading Hanji's reply as I made my way down to the kitchen to have my daily cup of tea.

From: Hanji
6:36

Really? Where?

To: Hanji
6:49

At some bar. We'll be watching Eren's gig.

From: Hanji
6:51
You guys will? Can I tag along? Eren also invited me last, last day. :D

The message made me frown. Eren invited Hanji, meaning that they're still talking.

Whatever. It's not like I have a control nor should I control who Hanji's going to talk to or not. I should just be glad that they're still friends after what happened.

From: Hanji
6:55

Okay, Shitty Glasses. Just be on time or we'll fucking leave your shitty ass behind.