Chapter 3 - Tomlinson

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Chapter 3 - Tomlinson

It’s disappointing that no matter how close we get, Robin still doesn’t pay me the slightest attention. I literally held her in my arms, and she still looked at me like I was a picture on the wall, nothing else. How I wish she would notice me, see that I would love to get to know her, to take care of her. Since I saw her the first time she has caught my eye, but she has never looked at me. And I started properly fancying her when I read her column for the first time. Although it was later when I finally accepted it. And after so long she still doesn’t know who I am. by now it gets really depressing.

I know that if I were a better player she’d notice me, but it’s hard. All my mates in the team are great, and it’s really hard to stand out. But I won’t give up, I can’t give up. I know I’m not bad, but I want to be the best. I’ve always wanted to be a great player, the greatest of them all, but now I have double motivation.

I take my trainingeven more seriously, doing my best at every practice. And even outside the field. I get up even earlier to go jogging and then I go to the gym, just to keep training before I go to class. In the gym I listen to the classes I record so I can study whilst I train.

I spend an hour every morning in the gym, running, lifting weight and even a bit of boxing. I always end up taking my shirt off because I get so into it, I sweat a lot. But after a week I notice how my endurance has improved, how I can run faster and for a longer period of time. And this small change encourages me to keep doing this.

I see Robin around campus, but she doesn’t see me. She’s with her best friend, but I don't know her name. I see them together all the time, so I assume they are friends. Sometimes she goes to the games as well. She’s a few centimetres taller than Robin with long and straight dirty blond hair. Most of the time I see her with a side braid. She has a similar style to Robin, with skinny jeans, comfy sweaters, and ankle boots. She’s very skinny, so skinny that she lacks curves whereas Robin has a more feminine body, like an hourglass, which if you ask me, drives me crazy.

I wish I could just approach Robin and ask her out. I definitely don’t have the guts and a part of me knows that for as long as I don’t stand out on the field, she won’t give me a chance. It’s not because she’s shallow or anything, I know she’s not. She can’t be. It’s just that she writes about athletes, the best ones. Those are the ones she pays attention to, so she can write her columns. Focusing on the other players won’t make her work better. By now I already know how important Robin’s column is for her and how seriously she takes her job for the Uni’s newspaper.

When she goes to the practices —yes, because as lame as it is I always notice if she’s around— I always see her with her pad and pen, taking notes. And taking pictures. She watches the game, but at the same time she works.

Maybe I should stop watching her and focus on the practice, but I can’t help it. I don’t know why she seems so fascinating to me. And I actually try to do this so the coach can see I’m trying harder than ever so he can put me as a right-forward. I’m currently playing as a right-back.

The star of our team is Connor, and he knows it, and loves it. He is an arrogant son of a bitch and I really have a hard time understanding why Robin ever gave him a chance. He gets late to our practices, he gets distracted during these, flirting with the cheerleaders or any other girl who’s around. Many admire him, but many more hate his guts. He doesn’t have any respect for anyone but himself. I mean, during today’s practice he knows Robin is around —she comes to see the practice sometimes— yet he still flirts with the leader of the cheerleading team. And Robin is there, watching.

I know, I know. I should be playing instead of seeing how sad she looks, how hurt that her ex boyfriend is shamelessly flirting with another girl in front of her, two weeks after they broke up. I also know it means nothing for Connor, because he probably never appreciated Robin and he was with her just to get in her bed, but still. The bloke could have a bit of decency and empathy.

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