00| + disclaimer

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prologue is in this chapter
keep reading!!

d i s c l a i m e r .

This story is completely and one hundred percent a work of fiction meaning any comments, actions, or opinions shared amongst the characters do not define my own in any way shape or form. Any similarities to other stories or real life scenarios are purely coincidental unless mentioned otherwise.

This story will contain mature language and/or intense sexual situations. Readers discretion is advised.

s t a t u s/ o t h e r I n f o:

First Published: August 19th, 2019
Completed: January 5th, 2021

CURRENTLY UNDER REVISION
(july 1st, 2021)

Prologue:

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"Would anyone wish to object the binding of this marriage? Speak now or forever hold your peace." Silence engulfs the field of people preparing for any inconvenience against the bride and groom.

Sweet melodic harmonies echo throughout the forest of trees surrounding us; little critters spitting nuisance through the air. Tension threatens peace amongst the seemingly happy couple standing before the alter until a chair squeaks and a petite girl stands to her feet.

The glare from the sun beaming on her skin made the sweat trickling down her forehead twinkle. Her hands vibrated against her thighs as she glanced around the open field at everyone who had now been focusing on her instead of the bride and groom.

They all watched as her nostrils flared and her lips trembled. Her breathing had almost become louder than any of the noise coming from outside. She gulped loudly and shifted on her feet for a moment. Her eyes trailing everyone that had been guests to this wedding. Gaining looks of disgust from quite a few people. It was normal though. Anyone would hate her for doing this at a wedding. She'd always be known as the girl who interrupted a marriage for her own selfishness.

"Me?" Her voice shallow and trembling. "That is what you're supposed to say at one of these, right?" She hesitantly spits, shifting from side to side.

She stayed quiet for a bit and allowed everyone's whispers and judgments to pile on her as if her own thoughts weren't enough to swallow her into a pool of humiliation on their own. She thought to herself how much of an asshole she would looked like if this whole thing didn't go as expected. Her aspirations weren't too high. All she wanted after all was to leave the alter with the brides soon to be husband who had splurged every cent of his work check to pay for this extravagant wedding for his fiancée. That wasn't too much to ask for, right?

"When I met you, things kind of just meshed between the two of us," she said. "You were a couple of years older than I was and everyone knew it. The two of us would spend day and night together just falling in love with each other all over again," the girl shifted on her feet and tucked a loose curl behind her ear, taking in a deep breath. "We put our hearts in each other. You accepted me along with every scrap of baggage I had to go along with my already messed up self. We fought through disagreements, disappointments, and doubt." she pauses.

Her focus shifts from the ground towards the brides groom. His eyes already on her. Watching as the tears ruined the face of makeup that had been done for the brides special day which she was now taking away from. Of course she felt bad, but this needed to be done.

She fought with herself the entire way here, promising herself that this would be it. That he would no longer call her his, and she would no longer be able to wake up hitting him with the pillow in the middle of the night because of the annoying sounds he made when he grinded his teeth. Yet in this moment, she wanted to hear it. She wanted to remember how annoyingly in love she was with him. How the most annoying things made her feel like she'd been falling all over again. Everything was all planned out though, she'd made sure of it for weeks in advance of this day. She even planned for her emotions to be pushed so far into her subconscious mind that it'd never be brought up again and it all worked out. Her plan was proven to be successful until she saw him moments from getting handed over to someone the both of them knew he couldn't possibly love as much as he once claimed to loved her.

"If you marry her today, you will regret it," the girl continues, tears clearly spewing over her waterline. "You will never be as happy as the both of us had been and you know it's true. I'm sorry to the bride for saying this, I truly am, but I couldn't give up my last chance to finally say what my gut has been trying to tell me. It's a horrible, wrenching feeling to long for something you know could never be satiated with things you're using to replace the only thing you know you need. That's what I've felt like these last few months. I thought it was me. It had to be me, I kept telling myself. Until today, I realized it wasn't me. It was you—it is you. I love you, Trevor Thornton and I don't know how not to love you."

The bride had been crying. Full blown sobbing, and despite it, everyone else's focus remained on the girl and the girls' eyes remained on the bride. The once judgey eyes everyone had been giving her before had glazed over and they were now sympathetic. At least she envisioned them to be.

"I don't know what I hope to get out of saying this today. A clear conscious I suppose? I just hope you are positive that you are in complete and utter love with her. Yes, maybe I've waited too long. Maybe your feeling for me have vanished and mine have grown stronger for every moment we have been apart, but I couldn't leave here today knowing I hadn't used my only chance to say this to you. To tell you how much I love you and how sorry I am for the way things ended between the two of us," she sighed. "That's-that's all," she ended.

Her eyes looked up at Trevor for the last time, flashing a weak smile before maneuvering away from the chair that had been placed in the wedding just for her.

When she had made it to her car, she opened the door and got in. Sitting there for a moment before she began hitting her steering wheel with the back of her fist, crying and yelling.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid."

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