Completed Wattpad Version of {Kinda, Sort Of}

Chapter 8~ Jason

Chapter 8

Jason

I remember Camryn's first kiss. Not her actual first kiss- but the first one that wasn't me. It was during the summer between freshmen and sophomore year. Camryn and I had had a few crushes and relationships here or there, but nothing as serious as her and Conner – "C-squared" was what I would call them.

Now, for any guy, this would be the time you start noticing people in a different way- especially girls. This is when us 'males' usually, I guess you could say, 'mature' and curtail the practice of rating girls 1-10. (At least out loud). It was a big change from "Yeah she's cute" to "WOAH! She's hot". Until that point in my life only two things mattered – soccer and friends; I had no room in the schedule for girls. Well, unless Camryn counted.

I had never had that revelation of "Oh, my best friend's a girl" – gender didn't matter to me. Everything in life was perfect just the way it was, until Camryn started changing. Because of my mother's instructive advice, I was well aware that boys underwent certain processes, but it had not yet occurred to me that it happened to girls, as well as Camryn.

The day I realized this was one I'll never forget.

It was during the time when all this was happening, and while C-squared was still an item. Soccer camp ended for the day, and I was on my way over to the Moore's to hang out with Camryn (as per usual). As soon as I had walked through the door, I started rambling off about something random, I assume, and accidently barged right into Camryn's room without a second thought.

"Jase!" Camryn cried out, frowning at the lipstick smeared across her face. With one hand, she covered her clothed body, as if she had been naked. I distinctly remembered my eyes bulging out of my head at Camryn, wearing make-up and a short, tight dress, something that I had never seen before then. Her new look made me see her in a different perspective. In words of the guy scale, she was off the charts, a perfect 10.

"You...um...I..." I responded.

"We're growing up Jason, and we need to respect that for each other – including knocking on closed doors." Camryn might have been trying to sound angry, but all it did was make my stomach feel funny and my heart perform a little tap dance.

In her own fiery way, I finally noticed that Camryn was not just my cute, wide-eyed best friend, but was beautiful. When I realized that I had actually said that out loud, we were both a little red in the face. Not just because of the word itself, but the way I had said it so whole-heartedly; as if preaching 'heavenly truth' straight from the old testament. My whole world had shifted, and Camryn felt the tremors in her world, too.

"Thanks, Jase...I'm just...um...super nervous for my date tonight with Conner. I don't know if this is alright, or if I'm not wearing enough makeup."

I had replied, "You're beautiful without makeup on, and trust me," I grabbed her shoulders, reassuringly, "you'll be fine on your date."

For some unknown reason, at that moment, the words "Conner" and "date" in the same sentence made me furious. My anger quickly dissipated though, when Camryn smiled. Oh, boy. When she smiled, for some reason, I had felt a tug in my stomach – that jittery, exhilarating feeling you get before speaking in front of the class. I felt the urge to touch Camryn – hug her, kiss her, rub the ends of her jet-black curls between my fingers...instead, I settled for brushing a loose piece of hair out of her face, and tucking it behind her ear. Camryn blushed, and, I guess, a new tradition was made.

When the doorbell rang, at first I thought it was the sound of my heart thumping too loudly in my chest, and was happy to discover that that was not the case. In a haze, I remember Camryn and Conner driving away, leaving me to pick a spot in Camryn's Corner to finish some 'fun' summer reading assignments; and by 'finish homework', I mean falling asleep one page into Romeo and Juliet. It wasn't until two hours later when I woke up within the darkened shop to the tinkling of bells on the front door. It seemed as though the couple had arrived back from their date with 'special' plans in mind.

Careful not to move or make a sound, I observed in horror as Conner grabbed Camryn by the waist and captured her mouth with his.

Jealousy.

That was the reason, I discovered, why I had gotten upset before at the mention of Conner. I was jealous.

Up until that point, I had been the most important boy in Camryn's life, (excluding family) and I didn't like anyone touching her or being with her all the time, except me. I know it sounds controlling, but when one person makes up the majority of your world, you can be selfish in ways that person doesn't deserve. At this time, I couldn't decipher whether the jealousy was deep rooted to ulterior feelings or not, I just knew it was there.

It felt as though it coursed through my veins, and my fist clenched, nails digging into my skin. Before I could register what happened, the shelf of books next to me flew to the floor with a loud crash.

The two pulled away, as if shocked, and whipped their heads in my direction. I was frozen, a deer in the headlights, as Conner glared at me, awaiting an explanation.

Quickly, I shut my eyes, stuck my hands out in 'Zombie position', mumbled some incoherent words, and yawned loudly as I walked stiffly up the stairs into the loft.

I practically sensed Camryn bringing a palm to her face and sighing. I only assumed Conner left quickly afterwards, as I continued to "sleep-walk" and flopped onto Camryn's bed.

Minutes later, still pretending to sleep, I heard Camryn come in, change into her pajamas and slip into bed next to me. As she lightly pressed herself against me, I could feel her fingers slide through my hair, moving away pieces.

She carefully whispered in my ear, "Jase, just what am I going to do with you?"

I felt her lean down towards my face, her breath soft on my lips before hesitating, and planting a slow kiss on my cheek. I then felt her head rest upon my chest, and my breathing began to slow. Only the sounds of slight motions filled the room, and almost instantly, Camryn was asleep. Without hesitating, I placed a soft kiss on her forehead, hoping she wouldn't wake up.

That was the day that I realized I could never change our relationship into something more. What we had there, in that moment, seemed to be perfect to me, just the way it was. I could never, would never, and should never like Camryn, in any way other than just my best 'female friend'. My 'B.F.F.' because "best girl friend" would be like setting my childishly maturing brain up for 'platonic-system failure'.

Author's Note:

Hello everyone! I hope you all have had a great week so far- we are doing great! Currently, we are in the works of deciding our official cover for the published version of KSO, so if you could, please leave us some of your thoughts, opinions, and ideas on that subject matter. Do you like the current one here on Wattpad? Would you change anything?

Also, what did you guys think about this chapter?! Give you more insight into these two "bud's" relationship? Liked or disliked the information you discovered? ;)

Lastly, THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! I am simply astounded at our views, votes, and comments right now! Keep it up!

Love you all,

kate