Unlikely

Realization

A little ways down the road...(filler sorta)

Naomi's POV
Rafael managed to get me a paid internship so I'd work with him most of the time. Plus, it would look pretty good on my resume that I worked with a Manhattan ADA and NYPD. I'd never given it much thought on what I would look into for a more permanent job but that would have to be a bridge to cross upon arrival.
It all seemed to work out in the end. Despite what has happened to me or my relationship with him, Rafael seemed to know how to work through everything. Like he'd seen everything there was to see or to ever see go wrong. And then there was the case that helped me realize my release, but not directly.
SVU brought him a case against some rapper, or his employer, or something. Anyways, the rapper's manager beat a trans woman to death, then the rapper killed his manager. Turns out, the poor transgender woman and the rapper we a thing. I don't remember exactly but Rafael didn't exactly enjoy working the case. This was a case I wasn't in on, I was assisting Pippa Cox on a domestic violence case in family court. Everyone thought I'd been spending far too much time with Rafael considering we lived and worked together.
More to the point, today he insisted on both him and I, plus the entire SVU squad go out to a bar to celebrate. Celebrate that they won, not that an innocent woman had to die to get there. But when everyone else came up with an excuse not to, I was the one stuck with the open invitation. Of course, I couldn't deny it because I live with the guy and all my plans are open to his inspection. Though, I should've tried saying Pippa and I were busy, but he'd probably ask her himself.
So we went, and got wasted.
Him, on his fifth cup of scotch sitting next to me, on my seventh shot of tequila. Rafi tried to cut me off at three but I was too busy trying to ignore the blonde at the end of the bar who blatantly twirled her hair and winked at him. There was no way that he hadn't noticed, yet he insisted I was being paranoid.
I wasn't in a bad mood though, initially. Clinging to Rafael's arm, I was giggling at something the bartender said when my gracious counselor growled something in my ear.
"Huh?" I turned and looked at him with a big goofy smile on my face.
"I said," He pulled my waist into his side roughly. "Are you trying to make me mad?"
I did an obnoxiously loud scoff before pulling away to look at him. His suit jacket draped over his chair and everything else he was wearing had been loosened. "Nooo," I practically sang my denial to him. "But the blondie over there is trying to make you somethin'."
"Let's go." He quickly grabbed me as carelessly as he did his jacket and we left the bar that was unusually crowded for a Thursday night.
Rafael didn't talk to me again until we passed the threshold of his apartment. Ignoring every little snort and joke I cracked in the cab. So that either meant he was really tired or really mad, and it was only 9 pm so tired likely wasn't it.
Not that my drunken state allowed me to care much. I still giggled and pestered him all the way up to the point before he slammed the bedroom door shut when I tried to follow him past it.
Knock knock knock. "Rafiiii," I leaned my face against the door to try and hear what we was doing. There was no shuffling or anything, and when I attempted at the doorknob it just stubbornly jangled. "Could you at least give me a blanket so I could sleep on the couch?"
When he didn't answer for a good minute and a half, I just went over and fell asleep on the couch with as many throw pillows I could find. What was his deal? He's the one who wanted to go out and celebrate.

-------

"Wake up sunshine."
"Huh? What time is it?"
"Don't worry, I called us both in sick. We won't miss much." Rafael handed off a cup of coffee and sat next to me.
I sat up, holding the cup to steal the warmth for myself. He had draped a plush white blanket around my shoulders and was taking sips from his own coffee. When I raised the mug to my lips, a pain shot through my entire body and I remembered how much I'd drunk last night. "Ah..." I sat the mug down on the coffee table and pressed a hand against my forehead.
"You drunk quite a bit last night Naomi." Rafael sipped casually from his cup. I leaned against his shoulder and groaned in pain, he simply sat there and let me curl into a ball at his side. "Do you need some advil?"
"Nuh uh." I looked up and smiled the best smile I could muster. "I need a hug."
He returned the smile and put down his cup of coffee to wrap his arms around my shoulders. I leaned my head against his chest as the pain stopped momentarily. Headache.

Flashback:
"Calm down niña loca. You trying to kill yourself?" Nevada pulled me into his side, almost causing me to spill my fifth glass of whatever alcohol he'd chosen for the night. "You're getting sloppy, No es lindo." I giggled in his ear when one of his buddies shouted something to him from across the bar. He only laughed cynically in response.
I pulled myself into his lap and put one of my arms around his neck, holding my glass in one hand and playing with the scruff on his face with my other. "Vaaada, can we go? I'm tired."
"We still haven't gotten a yes, so you need to go get them to agree to the deal" He pushed me off his lap and ignored my whines, leading me over to what looked like some heavy set white man. Likely rich and looking for some big drug dealer to invest in. My job was convincing him that Nevada was the right one. "All yours amigo."
He shoved me down into the mans lap and walked off deep into the club.

-------

"No no please stop." I pulled away from Rafael and scrambled the opposite side of the couch. I pulled my knees up to my chest and sobbed into them.
Rafael cautiously scooted closer and put his hand on my head. "Cariño, what's wrong?" I looked up but didn't say anything, I couldn't. My mind was still stuck in the memory and I failed to notice the worried man a foot away from me.
"Rafi..."
"Yes?"
"It's not over, is it?"
"It is, he's gone." He seemed to catch what was happening immediately but didn't rush to cradle and coddle me like a helpless baby.
Respectfully keeping his distance until I cried out and smiled. The tears running down my face were the sign of realization. "Nevada's gone."
Rafael laughed and nodded, "He is cariño, gone for good."
I wiped my face on the blanket that was still wrapped around me. "Thank you."
"For what?"
"Everything."

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A/N : Have y'all heard about the "Barba's secret" episode coming up in season 18? I'm super worried bc they said something vaugly about him getting hacked and his secret getting leaked and AH what if it's terrible?