《 What if we run away? 》

↠ chapter twelve

"Hey, calm down.." I say and gently stroke his back. Hansol really looks upset about something which I'm trying to find out but he doesn't seem like wanting to talk about it.
"Don't you want to tell me what's on your mind and about what you're tired of? I don't like seeing you sad" I say.
"I'm just tired of many things lately to be honest.. Forget it, I don't want to bother you with my problems. I'm gonna go to the studio and work on my lyrics again. I'm sorry, I will go now" he hugs me and leaves the party.
Wow. That's all he has to say? "Forget it, I don't want to bother you"? He for sure is a tough nut to crack. He never really talks about his true feelings, he rather listens to what other people have to say and listens to their problems. The only thing I want is to be there for him, to be the shoulder he can lean on..

After Hansol left the party, I left as well and got back home at 11pm. At first I go to Ally, to tell her everything that has happend today since I tell her everything and she always tries to help me. She suggests me to keep talking to him until he opens up about his feelings and don't give up on him when I feel he's worth it. And that's exactly the point, I would never give up on him. There is something about him that makes me never want to leave his side. As if something is telling me that he's the right one. I didn't know I was going to fall for him so much. I didn't know I was going to want him. I didn't expect the sudden need of him. He's the reason why I work even harder for what I want to achive. He's my motivation and takes away my fears. I don't really know what it is about him. Maybe it's the way nothing else matters when I see him, or how he makes me smile more than anyone else ever has. It could be the way he walks and expresses himself. But whatever it is, I just want him to know that it means everything to me.

_ _ _

* 12 months later*

I finished work for this week and pack my lecture books into my bag, wish Melody and Simon a nice weekend and head home to get ready for dinner with Evelyn. I haven't seen her since 5 weeks and it's always nice to catch up with her. It's a pity that we don't live in the same city anymore and can't see each other more frequently. But it's the best feeling when we finally do meet again.
And this reminds me that the last time I've seen Hansol was at the party all that time ago, where he left all of a sudden.. We haven't seen each other since then, we haven't even talked since then. I always try to tell myself that he didn't messaged or called me because he's so busy with Seventeen's promotions. And I know it must be really tiring for him at the moment with all the concerts and fansigns and other schedules, but I was hoping every day for a short message at least. But nothing came and I felt like dying inside each passing day we didn't talk. I didn't messaged him either because I wanted to give him time and space, I just didn't want to bother him and it wouldn't be a good thing when the manager sees that he would get messages from me. And I actually thought that maybe it was the best for both of us if we didn't see eachother anymore. Nevertheless, I would always be here waiting for him. 

It's half past six when Evelyn and I meet each other at this really neat restaurant near Gangnam station. We sit down and don't even look at the menu since we come here regularly and already know exactly what to order.
Our food came quickly as usually and we just talk about all the new events happening in our lives.
"So what have you been up to the last months?" asks Evelyn.
"I've been busy with work and other private stuff" I answer.
"Other private stuff? What do you mean? Is everything alright?" 
"Yes.. no. You know, Hansol and I haven't talked and seen each other in months and I'm worried about him. I mean we didn't even had a fight or anything. It was just that he left that party all of a sudden back then when I asked him about his feelings. He said something is tiring him, but I don't know what. I want to help him but it's so hard to get through to him.." I say.
"Oh.. that's what it is. Did you bother do call or text him though?" Evelyn asks.
"I wanted to call him many times but I can't. His manager is observing every little step he makes. I don't want him to get into more trouble because of me" I explain to her.
"I see. Damn, why are the korean entertainment contracts so strict. The artists are just like slaves and can't live and live life how they want to" she gasps.
I was just about to tell her more about Hansol and everything that happened the last months, when 4 guys enter the restaurant and completely caught my attention. I couldn't see their faces clearly since they had their hoods on and two of them were wearing face masks but I'm sure that I've seen them before. The guys sit down and they all take off their jackets, hoods and masks. That's exactly the moment where my heart stops beating for a second. The guys sat down two tables across from where we sit and their faces are unmistakably those of Mingyu, Seokmin, Joshua and Hansol. This situation is so unexpected and I try to keep calm, but I have a hard time breathing properly. I didn't expect to see Hansol any time soon and now he's having dinner with some of the members in the same damn restaurant as Evelyn and I do. What is this? Why are things happening to me full of coincidence? Is God playing tricks on me?
Hansol looks around and sees me in this very moment as well. He raises his eyebrows and I can see a slight smile around his mouth, his stare is piercing right through my soul.