pretend (phan)

nineteen

The next morning, Dan woke up alone. He got scared for a second, afraid that Phil had left, until he heard the clashing of pots in the kitchen. He smiled to himself, sitting up and covering his naked body with the white sheets.

"Phil?"

"Don't come in! I'm attempting to make breakfast!"

"But I desire cuddles," Dan pouted, jutting his bottom lip out as he sat in his bed.

"Well you can get cuddles once I'm done cooking," Phil sang back, and Dan gave up, flopping back against the pillows and looking up at the ceiling. Memories from last night flashed through his mind and his lips curled into a smile, his body feeling aflame.

Dan was nearly asleep again when Phil knocked on the door.

"Good morning, Sleeping Beauty," Phil grinned as he sauntered in, tray in his hands. He sat it down in front of Dan and Dan quickly sat up, mouth watering.

In front of him was pancakes, bacon, French toast and eggs. He gazed up at his husband. "This looks amazing." He complimented.

"So do you. No wonder people like to eat pretty things," Phil flirted, and Dan choked on his first bite of food with shock. Dan playfully smacked him and Phil laughed, sitting down next to him and nudging his head against his shoulder. "How'd you sleep?"

"Amazing. And you?"

"Just as well. I'm just glad I got to wake up next to you. I'm lucky that I get to do that," Phil murmured and Dan flashed a toothy grin, leaning and kissing him. It lingered before Phil pulled away. "Dan."

"Hmm?"

"I wanna marry you."

"What? We're already-"

"I mean marry you. Marry you because we both really love each other. No forced vows or shaking hands as we slide the rings on each other- rings that we didn't even choose for each other. We'll sell these rings and have our own private wedding, just us. No guests. Hell, it can be here."

"Phil, you are out of your mind," Dan giggled, taking his husband's jawline with both hands. "And I love it. I love you."

"So, will you marry me?" Phil's voice was soft, like Chinese silk or a worn out teddy bear. Dan felt his smile grow, dimples denting his cheeks.

"Yes, I will marry you."

And they hugged for what felt like eternity.

ღ

The 'wedding' was a few nights later. Dan was hauled up in his room as Phil told him to stay there until he was ready. They were both in the suits they wore at their actual wedding, Dan's hair beginning to curl from sweat. It was funny that he was nervous, when it was just them this time.

Dan reached down to fidget with his wedding ring before remembering they sold it and Phil's new ring was in his pocket. He let out a sigh, shifting his weight.

Phil calling his name dragged him from his thoughts. "Yeah?" Dan yelled back.

"I'm ready!"

Dan opened the door cautiously, hand sweaty on the knob. He took a shaky breath, completely pushing it open to see a row of rose petals leading into a different room. All the lights were off except small candles that lit the way, romantic 50s music playing on a vinyl in the background.

"Phil?" Dan chuckled, following the line of roses. His face hurt from smiling so much already, and the petals led him through the hall and into the livingroom. Everything was pushed out of the way, a blanket fort serving as a wedding arch. Fairy lights were hanging from the wall.

Phil was at the end of the petals, his back facing Dan. Dan made sure his steps were loud to alert his husband he was there, Phil turning around and eyes widening.

"You look so beautiful," Phil whispered when Dan met him under the blanket arch. Their eyes began to water when they took hands.

"I wouldn't be talking, Mr. Perfect," Dan tilted his head, poking out his tongue with a smile. "I like the arch."

"This won't be the only time we're under blankets," Phil flirted. Dan raised an eyebrow.

"Were you literally waiting to say that?"

"Yes."

"This wedding is cancelled," Dan joked, turning to walk away. Phil pulled him back with a "nooo", facing him. 

"Let me say my vows, asshole," Phil played. They both chuckled.

"How dashing of you," Dan retorted sarcastically, taking his husband's hands before Phil spoke.

"Baby," he began. "The fact that's it's almost been a year already is a blessing- and I'm atheist so that's saying a lot. So, an unreligious blessing, but I'm still lucky. I'm lucky to call you mine, to wake up next to you every morning and fall asleep the same way at night. To hold your soft hands and kiss your nice lips, to hold your precious face and hug your cute little hips. I appreciate every little feature of yours, whether you think its a flaw or not."

They were both tearing up, and Phil continued. "I'm insanely in love with you, and I don't know where I'd be if I hadn't met you. You gave me a home, physically and mentally, and you gave me a family- which will hopefully grow, whether that's with pets or kids or both. I want to grow old with you, to hear you complaining about how your back hurts while you cling to a cane. I want all of you, forever, and I promise to cherish it."

Then it was Dan's turn. "Philip Howell-Lester, you have changed me into a completely different human and I am not complaining. I was ignorant and overlooked reality. Then I met you, and it's like you're some dream that I never wanna wake up from. You've taught me what love really is, and that home is not only a place but a feeling as well. You've made me realize how special people really are, how we all have unique traits that make us different. And you're special. You are very important, to others and to me. You have laughed with me and smiled at me and I want to experience more memories with you. I want to be yours, and for you to be mine, for the rest of my life."

Phil let a tear slide down his cheek as he placed the ring on Dan's finger while he spoke. "I do."

Dan opened his mouth to respond when suddenly the blanket fort collapsed, the sheets falling on top of them and creating a silhouette over their heads. They found their way to each other, blanket still over them, and Dan took his face as they both tried to stop laughing.

Their lips pressed together gently and Dan slipped the ring on his hand.

"I do."

And this time, Dan really meant it.