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Author's note

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Author's note.

So um. Good news for you guys. I'll be writing a bit more. There's a lot of dialogue in this chapter, I mean it's not very detailed but you're just gonna have to like get the main idea of it like it's basically self explanatory what's going on. I do give, like actions and shit, but like I actually... idk I know where I was going with it, it just didn't come out as amazing as I would've liked.

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I am utterly and completely pathetic.

I haven't stepped foot outside my dorm for 4 days on end. The total of those four days, I have eaten an equivalent of 2 snack cakes. Sometimes I think that I just overreact about everything. Then I realize that I have the right to react however I damn well please.

Why me? I know that 'Why me' is technically a question, but I've asked myself that so many times in the last couple of days that it has turned into a statement. "Why me?" The iconic question that all people ask themselves when something unfortunate happens to them or if they are simply in pain. How common of me. I keep asking myself every thirty seconds or so 'Why wasn't I enough', 'Why did he do that to me', 'Why am I so stupid', Why Why Why. For once in the past four days I today ask 'What'.

"What were you thinking?" I stupidly ask myself aloud. I slap both hands onto my face, covering my eyes. I rub my eyes. What am I doing? I sit up and let my feet hang over the edge of my bed. There's a peck at the window. There's a tiny, brown owl just dancing at my window. Another letter. I sluggishly get up and trod up to the window. It takes me a painfully long time to lift up the bottom glass. I pet the small owl under his beak. He gently nips at my forefinger. The thing can't be taller than 6 inches. I've gotten several letters in the last few days . Most likely all from Harry. I have opened 2 of the 9 that were sent to me.

Letter #1

"Let me explain. Please Draco." Harry

Letter #2

"Harry told me everything Draco, just let him explain. We're worried you haven't left your dorm in 2 days. Write me back ASAP!" Hermione

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I force the window closed as soon as the skiddish owl flies away. It's cold in here. Maybe I should leave my room at least once. I need a shower. I look at the clock 9:17 AM. It's Sunday, there shouldn't be a lot of people around. m. I bite my lip a little too hard.

"Oh shit" I say instinctively. I carelessly throw together something to wear after I wash. I open my door and sprint out of the room. I pass 3, maybe 4 faces on the way there. I walked too fast to pay attention to see who they are. I turn the water on as hot as it can go right after i get into the loo. Sometimes the water will make you feel like you poured salt on yourself and stepped into a bathtub full of ice, that's how cold it gets. This is not one of those times. The water was hot, almost intolerable. Though the water scorched my skin, I stepped right into it without difficulty. I am just done with everything. I don't feel like doing anything. I don't feel like moving, or bathing, or just anything. I'm tired of trying. I sat in the floor of the shower for a good 20 minutes before finally rubbing shampoo into my hair.

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