Fighting temptation

The man, the food and conversations with mother

'Oh I didn't know you were awake.' There is that squeeky voice again. The one that sounds as though my inards were being squeezed.
He stretched his long frame his eyes never leaving mine then got up and walked to me.

'You gave me a fright yesterday.'
I looked down in embarrassment. Usually when I get these fucking migraines there is never anyone around. But of course he had to experience my helplessness. I hated feeling that helpless.
I looked up to answer but his hands wrapped around me. The words evaporated from my brain. How could I talk when his hands felt like getting home at the end of a long trying day. I sighed and settled more into him. He smelled so good.
The kiss on my temple was followed by an 'how are you feeling today.'

'Better,'I said not bothering to add better now that I am wrapped in your arms.

Of course my stomach chose that moment to growl like a wild animal. This was so damn embarrassing.

He chuckled, released me and said 'I guess that is my cue. Tell you what, why don't you take breakfast and I will go take a shower then join you in a bit.'

I nodded.
He kissed me gently on the mouth and left before my body started to cause havock.

Fresh orange juice the same crisp one I had drunk yesterday. Coffee-- black, eggs, bacon, pancakes, pork sausages, fried bread,
tomatoes, mushrooms, plantain, and kidneys.
Who was supposed to eat all these?
I did laden my plate with the mushroom, plantain a bit of the kidney in cream, the warm bread and a sausage. Halfway through my plate I did realize just how easily you could finish the bloody food. Every dish delicious, every morsel reviving me such that the dull ache subsided and vanished completely.
The appreciative noises that came out of my mouth as I finished with the bread dipped in an amazing jam was alien. I need to know the recipe of that jam.

When the warm feeling of satisfaction wrapped its arms around me I got this strong urge to call my mom. I always called her after this 'near death' ' experiences. Probably to feel close to the living.

'Hi mama.
'Hi baby. How are you.'

I could feel her moving from the slightly noisy background and close a door. It felt nice to just have her voice on the line. Uninterrupted mothers voice.

Missing you I smiled. I missed her carefree laugh, her unconventional motherliness. The sound of her bangles as she put her hands around me. Enveloping me with her sexy fragrance. It was weird how I always thought of my mom as sexy. Actually everyone thought so. Even the boys in high school who always came home in pretense of borowing a book. I could see the appeal.
She was tall, slender in a modelisque way with dark chocolate skin so unlike mine and so much like a bronze goddess. We were so different yet so alike in our difference. I wondered if Kev would fall under her spell.

You haven't come to see me in a while. She was saying.

'Work has been crazy,' I said tongue in cheek. Kev was work right? 'But I will try coming over next weekend.'

Are you sure it is work or you finally met some nice young man that I haven't yet met.'

I groaned.

'What makes you think I would tell you if there was one? '

'Oh but I always find out. Last time Amina said you were behaving like a cranky old nun. I think it is better for all of us if you got laid.'

'Mom...'

'What?! You need to live a little and stop this prudish behaviour. I am probably getting more action than you with my creaky old limbs.'

'Mom stop... First I think you should stop talking with Amina about my love life or lack thereofre. Second you are not old. Third who is it that you are bumping uglies with this time? '
She groaned.
' you sound like an old lady. Who even says bumping uglies anymore? I think it is time I got you a nice young man. Philip is too serious... Collins looks like he drinks beer with a straw...
She went on with the list having diverted my attention from her latest flame.
I accepted long ago about mom's free spirit. She only mentioned a man if she was seriously considering dating him. For someone I didn't know could date until I got to university she has a very active love life.
We continued the conversation me trying to convince her I didn't need her help.

We ended the call with me promising I would go visit her as soon as I could. I was too curious to meet this secret man that she was hiding from me.

***
I was sipping the orange juice when he came out. A thick towel wrapped around his middle his chest gleaming in the morning light.
I averted my eyes and focused them on the TV. Goddamnit let the man have his breakfast I told my brain.

He poured hinself coffee a generous serving of pancakes bacon and eggs. It hit me that this guy really loves pancakes.

I flipped through the channels trying to keep busy. Keep my eyes away from his hands as he cut and stabed with purpose the food on his plate.

'How long have you had them?'

I looked at him. Have what?

'The migraines.' He added before I could ask what he meant.

I frowned trying to think of the genesis.
'I honestly don't know. I do remember that just before I sat for my final primary exam. I came home with this splitting headache and assumed I was going to die.'
My head was starting to pound just from the memory.
'It was so bad that I lay outside the gate passed out for 15 minutes. People just assumed it was exam fever.'

He reached out to smooth his hand on my brow. I stopped the frown and leaned my head on to his palm, eyes closed. I wish I had met him earlier my mind whispered as his fingers wrapped around my cheek. I pulled back before I could say that aloud.
'Before that day it was just some rare random headaches that usually just went away after a couple of hours.'
He nodded.

'You didn't have anything on you. Any medication.'
A statement. An accusation probably. I knew he meant yesterday's episode.
I stood up. Defensive. Moved to the window.
I did not owe him an explanation. This was beginning to feel like a doctor Phil episode. All this sharing, accusations and concerns, that is not how this arrangement should be like.

He was next to me his hands wrapping around my waist. 'I am sorry.' Just that one statement and I started to feel bad. Jeez, this person had gone out of his way to make sure I was ok and the only thanks he gets is a cold shoulder.

'I try not to get hooked on the medication.'
I turned to look at him. 'Yesterday I just thought it won't hit until I got home...

What I did not tell him was that I was scared of being dependent on drugs. That unless it was too bad I preferred home remedies that include lots of sleep. I did not tell him of that day long ago when I almost overdosed.

He nodded and pulled me even closer to him. I felt his steady heartbeat next to my ear. The strength of his arms around me. I unwrapped myself from him.
'Finish breakfast.'
'What if I want another kind of breakfast?' He gave me a meaningful look that dipped to my now gapping robe.
I pulled the two halves together and stepped away from him.
'I think I like my men well fed. Minimises the chance of them fainting when they are supposed to be servicing me. I am an all night kind of girl you know.'

I winked. He groaned.
Tried to pull me back to him and I ducked.
I picked his plate and handed it to him letting the robe gape open.
'The beauty is in the desert.' I said in a throaty voice.
I applauded my attempt at sexiness. Especially after seeing the look in his eye.
There was a knock...

***
A/N day late but I still deliverd no? Lol