secret - sm (rewriting)

alone & lonley || thirteen

Angela

It's been hours since Shawn came home, six to be exact. I'm scared, what is he doing? Why can't he here with me right now? I need fucking support and he's not here. I tried to call and text, no answer. I need somebody here that cares and just wants to cheer me up from all this. I gave up calling Shawn so I called someone who would actually pick up, Cameron.

I dialed his number, the phone rang a couple of time before he answered back. "What's up Angie?" he asked, his voice hoarse, like he just woke up. "I-I need you, Shawn's not here and I'm alone and lonely. Please come over." I heard shuffling on the other line, waiting for a reply.

"Uh yeah I'll be there in a bit." We said our goodbyes and I hung up. I awaited for him to come, he knows me well. Tia and Suede are always out, now their trying to make a clothing line, which is turning out very well. I don't want to bother them since their always busy, traveling, promoting their brand.

Not to long later I heard the door open, I walked to the living room to see who it was. It was Cameron. I forgot I gave him a spare key, I hoped that it was Shawn so I could smack him. "Hey Angie. Are you okay? Do we need to talk?" he asked.

"I just want support, Shawn fucking left me and he hasn't came home yet. Let's watch a movie?" I rambled on, "I just think it's funny how, were in a "relationship" but he's always leaving and being unsupportive." I used air quotes, rolling my eyes. "You guys are a thing?" he asked in a hurt tone. "Well, I don't know, I thought we were but I thought wrong. We literally started dating yesterday, I was gonna keep it a secret till my big mouth told everybody."

"I understand. So wanna cuddle or something? What do you want to do?" he asked, changing the subject. I pointed to the couch, "Netflix marathon definitely."

-

Cameron and I had a popcorn fight, cried during romantic movies, built a blanket fort, and overall cheered me up from my miscarriage. This helped him too, one of our babies died and it was hard for us. It was kind of hard for me to walk, Cam carried me. We had our fun, but Shawn still wasn't here, sadly.

"I think it's best for me to go home." Cam said getting up. "Please don't go, stay the night." I begged. "What about Shawn?" I cringed at his name, "Come on I'm the mother of your child, please stay." he shook his head. "I don't want beef."

I giggled. Not wanting beef? That's something middle schoolers say. "Please! Can you? You can talk to the baby." I said in a persuasive tone. Finally he agreed and we went to my bedroom. I just got this apartment not to long ago, I wanted space and my own place to call my own.

"Here I'll lay on the bed, then you can talk to the baby." I did what exactly said lifting my shirt, revealing my slightly chubby stomach. Cameron walked over kissing my stomach and said, "Hey baby, I know you brother or sister died and I just want you to know that things will get better, Daddy loves you very much, and don't forget mama too. Please hold on for us baby, I can't wait to see you! Stay strong for us."

I was in awe. It was so cute how he was just casually having a conversation with my stomach. He took off his shirt, he already had sweatpants on so he just kept them on. I went to the bathroom to change and brush my teeth.

Cameron and I didn't hug, knowing him and I were just friends, he tried not to hug me or get really close to me. I felt my eyes getting heavy and soon I saw darkness.

-

I woke up, Cameron was gone, he actually left a note, unlike Shawn.

Dear Angela,

I know when you wake up you're going to read this so good morning! I have meetings with Bart today so sorry I had to leave! I'll call you later! Have a great day.

Love, Cameron

I got up and got ready, to confront my "boyfriend" for leaving me. I want gonna cause a scene, which me being the extra bitch I am, was normal to me. I drove to his place, the door open, which was weird. I'm confused, he would always lock his door.

I walked across the beautifully decorated hallway till I stopped at his room. I barged in and there he was, just as suspected. I came up to where he was and I slapped him. Right on his cheek, which he held after.

"What the fuck? You leave me to go home? You wouldn't answer anything!" I yelled. "I have a reason." I crossed my arms giving him a look. This better be good. "What was so important?" I asked, with attitude in my voice. "Tour meetings." Oh hell no.

"You couldn't answer you're phone! You had the whole day! You're bullshit! Good thing Cameron came over and actually cared cause you didn't." he looked surprised. "What did you want me to do? Did you really just go to you're ex cause I wasn't there that's pathetic." no honey. Don't you dare shit talk me.

"Actually he's the baby daddy of my baby, I had a miscarriage, which you don't seem to care about." I slapped him once more then stormed out the door.

Shawn

I lied. I wanted to surprise her with gifts and take her on an extravagant date, just the two of us, but when she mentioned Cameron, I lost it. My hatred towards him is unbearable. He stole my girl once, now he's stealing her again. It pisses me off how he cheated, yet she's still letting him see the baby.

I could be a father figure, she could have let Cameron out of their life. It's so annoying. I wish she knew that. But for now, she's mad at me. Ugh, how am I going to apologize?

I've texted, I've called, she's being petty, as always but she needs to stop being so childish. If she wants to be like that fine. If she runs back to Cameron and he breaks her heart again, whose gonna tell her 'I told you so'? Me! She needs to understand that she's mine and only mine, like who the fuck is Cameron to just take her from me and expect me to not have hatred towards him?

I want her back, it's only been a couple of hours but I need her here. I realize I shouldn't have said anything and me saying it's pathetic, I didn't mean it. I'm just jealous. Like who wouldn't be? We're "together" but she hangs out with her ex?

I guess it was my fault. I shouldn't have said anything or shaded her or Cam in anyway. I should of told her I was planning our big date but it's too late.

I need to apologize. It better be a good damn apology.

-

it's 1,207 words I'm proud

honestly shits going to go down ;)