Chapter Forty-Eight

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Chapter Forty-Eight

Dani

My heart is slamming in my chest and I feel like I'm on the brink of a panic attack, but strangely it doesn't actually happen. My head doesn't feel quite so fogged up with thoughts and craziness. I'm holding Eli's hand. I'm holding Eli's hand!! He hasn't said anything about it, which I'm thankful for. I don't quite know why I did it or how I feel about it, but I do know that it isn't freaking me out as much as it used to. Maybe it's the drugs, maybe I trust him more than I think. Maybe it is a combination of the two, I don't know. I just know that it doesn't feel as awful as I imagined it would.

We eat silently until there's a knock on the door. Eli gives my hand a tiny squeeze as he stands up to open the front door. He informs me it's his dad before he lets Don in.

“Hey dad.”

“Hey guys. How's it going?”

“Good thanks. How was work?”

“Busy. What about you?”

“Yeah, it was good. I have to start jogging again though.”

Don chuckles and says, “I should get some hand to hand combat in now, while you're unfit.”

“Not unfit, just not as fit as I was, thank you.”

Don turns to look at me and he asks, “How are you feeling, Dani?”

“Ok, thank you sir.”

“Is the medication helping?”

I see Eli smile when his dad asks that. I can almost hear his thoughts on that one. I bite back a small smile of my own as I say, “I think so. Thank you.”

“Good. I have your next 2 doses. I can see you're eating so I'll leave you to it. I just wanted to drop these off. I'll bring more tomorrow...”

My eyes widen and my eyebrows shoot up in surprise when I hear my own voice ask, “Would you like some, sir?”

I hear Eli cough out of shock and to be honest, I don't even know what came over me to ask Don such a thing. He breaks me out of my thoughts, “I don't want to intrude...”

“No sir, it's ok.... It's the least I can do to thank you.”

“Are you sure?”

I hesitate and I think he takes it as uncertainty, so he says, “It's ok. Thank you for the gesture, but I'll save it for another day.”

“No, it's ok. Honestly. Let me fix you some.”

I stand up to fix Don a plate and Eli tells his dad to sit down at the breakfast bar. Eli sits next to his dad and starts talking about having a training session. I turn away from the stove and towards the breakfast bar with Don's plate but then I feel panic settle in. Both men are sitting at the breakfast bar, not giving me any space to finish my dinner. The other thing that fills me with dread is the thought of getting Don's dinner to him without being too close for comfort. I don't know what to do as I just stand there, holding Don's dinner. I'm not sure how long I stand, rooted to the spot, but Eli appears in front of me. I had zoned out until I see him standing in front of me, so I jump out of my dazed state and take a giant step back.

Eli whispers, “Hey, baby, it's just me. You ok?”

I don't answer, I just hold onto Don's plate. I see Eli reach behind him and grab my dinner before he takes Don's plate from my hands. He gives me my food and whispers, “It's ok, sweetheart. You want us to eat in the living room?”

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