flare | JACOB BLACK [2]

~ THIRTEEN ~

~~

My dad was the one who had given me the idea of leaving clothes in my trunk. He knew the clothes were baggy and oversized.

It was already dark out when I returned home. I tried walking in quietly and unnoticed but my dad was pacing back and forth in the living room. As soon as the flooring creaked underneath my foot my dad turned towards me. He had a look of fury on his face but as he recognized my clothing it quickly replaced to sympathy.

"Avery, why didn't you tell me you shifted?" My dad asked, rushing over to me. He held my face in his hands and looked over me. "Are you alright? You didn't hurt anyone did you? Did you hurt yourself? Why did you shift? Did someone get you angry? Was it Jacob?" He bombarded me with question after question.

I pulled his hands away. "Yes, dad, I'm fine. Everything is fine." I quickly made up a lie in my head. "And no, I didn't get angry at Jacob. My temper just got out of control, that's all."

"Okay, as long as you're alright." He breathed.

I gave a small smile and walked upstairs to my room. I sat on my bed gently and shut my eyes, trying to regain myself. I opened them seconds later and grabbed a small mirror on my nightstand. I looked horribly sick. Whether it was from standing out in the rain or shifting I wasn't sure. I felt weak and just wanted to rest. It was eleven o'clock at night.

I was about to go to bed but heard a tap on my window. I waited for another one to make sure I wasn't hearing things. It came and so did the quiet shout of my name. I quickly got up and opened my window to see who it was.

"Avery!" I was looking down at Jacob. A couple of small rocks in his hand.

"What the hell do you want?" I asked with a mean stare.

"To explain, like I told you I would." He was sincere. Damn, he was sincere and I was helpless to it.

"Wait up, I gotta sneak you in."

"No, I can climb up, just move over."

I raised a brow in question but moved over, nevertheless. I heard a few steps against the outside of my house and a tree branch creak. Jacob grabbed the edge of the window and came into my room. And there we were looking at each other. I looked sick and he looked beautiful. I wondered how I had someone like Jacob coming up to my room. The short hair suited him and his body was perfectly toned. Lately, I noticed he had been filling out but I didn't know he was filling out this well.

"So." I prompted him to speak.

"You don't look too good, are you--?"

"I'm fine." I interrupted

"Oh okay," Something had to be different if he was acting this awkward. "I have a lot to explain."

"You do." I crossed my arms and looked up at him, waiting.

"Sam, he's the alpha of the pack. That's what his 'group' is. I shifted not too long ago and he was there for me. I knew I couldn't do this alone so, I joined the pack." He softly explained.

"That made you not want to talk to me for more than a week?"

We were both sitting down at this point. Just looking at each other. Jacob had such a loving and pure look in his eyes but, there was something else there that I couldn't identify.

"It was part of the reason. I knew you hadn't shifted in awhile amd assumed you didn't like shifting at all. I thought maybe you wouldn't want anything to do with me if you knew I couldn't control my shifting at all. So I avoided you because I was worried but then," He took a pause and looked directly into my eyes.

"But what, Jacob?"

"You-You don't feel it?"

We were so close, just a few inches away from each other. All I felt was a longing towards Jacob. I want to be wrapped in his embrace and be told that everything would be okay. But I doubt that was he meant.

"No, I don't think so."

"Nevermind then." I could hear the hurt in his voice so, I didn't ask anymore questions related to that.

"Did Sam cause this change in you?"

"No, this was mostly me." Jacob grinned.

"I would've never pinned you for a guy that would get a tattoo." I joked.

We laughed softly in the dim light of my room. A breeze came in through my open window.

"Avery," Jacob started and grabbed my hand gently; intertwining our fingers. "I think you should meet Sam, he can help you."

As much as I didn't want to admit it, I needed help.

"You're not going to leave me for another week, are you?" I seriously questioned.

"No, no. I could barely stand being without you for that long."

I brought our intertwined hands to the side of my face and leaned against it. Jacob's hand was still as warm as that night at the movie theater, but I had become used to it.

"I--" I began uncontrollably but stopped myself quickly. I was going to say those three words because I felt it so heavily but I couldn't say it now. We were just fixing things, I could destroy it by saying that.

"What?" Jacob asked, slight excitment in his voice. Maybe he already knew what I was going to say.

"I'm happy." I covered. "Really happy." But wasn't happiness a version of 'I love you?'

"Me too." He said unexpectedly.

And I couldn't help but smile.

...

"Sam, this is Avery. Avery, this is Sam." Jacob introduced.

We were both standing. Sam stood tall against me and had an intimidating face to match.

We were in Sam's house. Jacob had told me to "not stare" at what, I had no idea.

"You can sit down." He said in what I assume is his naturally deep voice. It was still somewhat frightening, natural or not.

We all three took a seat and I, uncontrollably, held a stiff posture. Jacob put his hand over mine and gave me comforting look.

"So, I brought Avery here because she controls when she wants to shift and I think she could use your help. The same way you helped me." Jacob told him.

Sam was surprised at the fact that I could control my shifting. Then he turned to me. "Why do you try to prevent it?"

"I've never liked it. It just doesn't have many good memories attached to it. And I like to have full control over certain things." Somehow I felt content with revealing my feelings with Sam who was basically a stranger to me.

"You can fully control yourself as a wolf. In fact, it gives you more power. You should embrace it to the fullest." He stated. "Talking to the rest of the pack might make you more comfortable with the idea of shifting."

"Okay, I like that idea." I agreed.

I could see Jacob's smile out of the corner of my eye and felt him hold my hand a bit tighter. I was hopeful. Maybe things were changing for the better.