Chapter 16 - Alone With You

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The next day, as Doug drove them to school, Jess looked out the window at the passing countryside, her thoughts on Marty.  Knowing they'd worked out whatever was going on with him, she felt at peace.  It was still going to be difficult seeing him at school, but she was confident that at least their time together would make up for it.  Smiling as she remembered how she'd convinced him to do his homework with her, she felt happy.  She'd always preferred doing homework with friends, inviting one or more over after school nearly every day.  They'd watch American Bandstand while they had a snack, and then do homework at the kitchen table while Cora cooked dinner.

Thinking of those girls back in Manhattan brought her thoughts to Louise.  Even though she'd only known her for a day, Jess thought she'd found her first female friend.  The curly haired redhead was smart and funny but even better, she wasn't afraid to be herself and didn't seem as worried about status as everyone else.  Jess wanted to spend as much time as she could with Marty, but it would be fun to do some things with Louise.  Maybe they could have a sleepover, or go to a movie once in a while.  But when she thought about asking her, she realized she had a problem.

"Doug, do you know Louise Brooks?" she asked, turning towards him as they entered the town. 

"Brooks, Brooks, Brooks," he said quietly to himself as he thought.  "No, I don't know anyone named Brooks," he said finally.  "Why?"

"She's a girl I met.  She's really nice."

"What's her dad do?" Doug said, turning off the two lane road onto the street that led to the high school.

"I – don't know," she replied hesitantly.  If this was the first question he'd asked, she now knew more than ever how important the answer was.  Her suspicion was confirmed by the wary look in his eyes as he glanced over at her.

"You weren't going to mention her to dad before you found out, were you?"

"No.  I know better than that," she muttered angrily, looking out the window at the passing groups of teens.  

"Good.  Because I don't need the hassle," he said, sounding angry himself.  "Find out, and I'll tell you if it's okay or not," he added more calmly.

"Okay," she said with a deep sigh.  She felt a pain in her chest as she remembered how much simpler her life had been when her parents were still alive.  It had never mattered to them who she brought home, or what their fathers did for a living.  It made her sad to realize she'd never have that life again and friends like Marty, or maybe even Louise, couldn't even be mentioned at home. 

"Doesn't it bother you to live like this," she asked Doug.

"Like what?" he asked, turning into the high school parking lot.

"Not being able to be friends with whoever you want."

He frowned but didn't say anything as he looked for a parking place and pulled in.  When he turned off the ignition, he faced her, still frowning.

"Look, Jess.  I'm lucky to be living this life – and so are you," he added as if it suddenly occurred to him.  "We aren't like the rest of the kids in this school.  We have responsibilities that go along with all – this," he said, moving his hand to indicate his new car.  "Maybe not all of it's fun, but I'm grateful to be in this family.  And you should be too," he added sternly, reminding her instantly of her uncle.  He got out of the car and slammed the door shut before walking off, leaving her alone.

With her face flaming and her ego bruised, she gathered her books, lunch, and purse.  She wasn't being ungrateful, she thought angrily as she opened the car door.  She just wanted to be allowed to be friends with whoever she liked.  What was wrong with that?  Spotting Louise's red curls among a group of girls that included Patty and Janet, she walked to them. 

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