"You don't have to come." I say picking some grass off of the hill I run on.
"Bullshit I wanna see you run in person." Nassir says standing close to the counter. He comes to meet me after I run because "he just don't fuck with that running".
We snapped which turned to texting, which turned into phone calls, that turned to Face Times and eventually just pulling up. Lena stopped hanging around more and more and it made me feel less lonely.
"Fine by me." I shrug scratching my arm.
I had a moment the other day and I put more on my arm and I regret it even more than ever because this shit kills me.
Noticing me my discomfort Nassir peeks at me. "You good?"
"Rash from so lotion." I lie easily.
"Let me see." He asks and I cringe.
"Some other time when I'm not on the clock." I attempt to dodge the bullet again.
"I know you hot. The sun didn't even set yet and you're running in this thick black ass hoodie." He comments.
"Doesn't bother me." I shrug my shoulder putting my chin on my knees waiting for the sun to set. I usually like to beat the sun before it sets.
It's like I'm racing against something bigger than myself.
"Tell me about your past boyfriends." He ask leaning back on his elbows.
I lay flat on my back next to him. "Nothing to tell because I never had one."
"Calling you on bullshit." He laughs until he realizes I was serious.
"Why not?" He question a little more softly.
I'm not blind to anything about him. He's undoubtably hood and rough around the edges. I'm nothing like that I'm just me. I don't want to change him or even get into his world. I wanted a friend. If I got it from someone who is seemingly the least likely to give me friendship then oh well.
"You want to see the real me? I'll give it to you? If you too afraid to show me you. I'll show you me." I swallow hard.
"Show me you." I see rolling on my side and he sits up lifting his shirt revealing his body.
"Alright 2002 cigarette burn from my dad, foster home for 3 weeks." He points to a small scar on his forearm. "2003 I fell off a bike and got a scrape my dad was drunk so he put a nail in to to fix it ,moved in with my grandparents." He shows me the scar on his elbow. "2005 my dad shot me and my older brother, hospitalized for over a month from and infection the bullet caused." He lifts my hand to wound on his shoulder. "2007, my dad broke into my grandparents house high and tried to stab me, they just cleaned it up." He moves my hand to a jagged scar on his side. "2010 my dad jumped into a lake and died. I don't know how I feel about it." He pulls his shirt back over his head leans back on his elbows.
Raw emotions flood threw me.
"Sad that you never had a real relationship with your dad but happy he can't hurt you anymore?" I ask and he glances at me.
"Better in words than what I could ever say." I pat his shoulders and he reaches up to grab my hand.
And he holds it for a second before letting go.
Taking off my hoodie careful not to show my arms I sit Indian style next to him.
"I don't have any real friends and the one I did have was my cousin. But eventually she got embarrassed because of how dark I am." I stop talking for a second and see him look at me to keep going.
"So this summer I brought this stuff and it was supposed to lighten my skin. I didn't use it because I was feeling happy again but then I had a day. I got so low and so depressed. I wanted to explode into pieces I still didn't use it. The first day of school I wanted a fresh start. So I put some on my arm. And then I went lower again and put more on at first it was to see if it works but every time I put it on I feel like I'm in control of my skin."
"Show me." His voice is stern and I lift my arm to show him. The whiteness of my arm.
"It's swollen Rayna what the fuck. Even I know this shit cancerous." He strokes it lightly and the white reddens.
Grabbing my face. "You don't need that shit. And you don't need me to tell you that. The fact that you hide it in the first places tells me right there that you regret doing this shit."
"I do so much. I can't stop either." I whisper dropping my head.
"Girl it's the color of your skin. You can't change that. No matter how white you get it won't be white enough. Still black at the end of the day." He let's go of my face before going back into his original position.
"You have a lot of friends?" I question pulling my hoodie back on before he stops me.
He pulls off his shirt. "It's just us we open right now." And I lay back down next to him tossing the hoodie to the side.
"I have one friend. I would never tell nobody this shit but since I'm sharing my feelings." He teases. "Nevermind I'm not ready to tell anybody this yet." He stops abruptly.
"Just close your eyes and lay here." I tell him doing the same.
"Trying to sleep." He says grabbing my hand again.
"Nope just clear your mind lay here and think. I don't talk to people much. All this talking is blowing my natural high." I joke.
"Excuse the hell out of me." He's still holding onto my hand and it makes me want to smile. It's just friendly and sweet.
Nassir is comforting to be around. It makes me feel like I have someone else beside my mom.
"I know your thinking and even if me saying it doesn't change how you feel about yourself. But for what it worth, I think your fuckin pretty. And I don't know how you'll take this but your just another pretty girl to me. I don't see a pretty dark skinned girl, a pretty brown, light whatever type of chick. Just pretty. Inside too."
My heart smiles. And warmth spread through me.
"But you need to feel that shit. A nigga like me can't fix your insecurity or how society is. Because this world ain't shit Rayna. These dumb people think this way and you can't let them dictate your mental health and your physical. Tryna give yourself cancer that's smart to you?" He preaches and I roll my eyes.
"I'm not one for too many words. But it take more than a lecture from Coach Nassir to change what I see everyday." He holds my hand a little tighter.
"Sun is setting and I went for a run almost an hour ago my momma don't play that." I stand up reaching out my hand to help him up.
Dusting the grass off of my shorts and sweater he pulls me into a bear hug.
"How far you live?" He questions slipping his phone out of his pocket.
"Not far I'll just run there." I tighten my ponytail on top of my head.
"4:00 on Friday right?" He questions.
I nod in response.
"Bet my bro goes to school there he'll come with me."
After finally saying bye I start my run home. Having a friend that just wants to be my friend feels great. Lena is obligated because of you know genetics. Cierra would be great but she's ten feet deep in her boyfriends ass and she a competitive cheerleader so she has no time. And Keegan well that's not a friend. Jamal was becoming a friend but the dream died nearly a month ago.
Nassir is a fresh start to friendship. It motivates me to get out there to meet other people to befriend.
YOU ARE READING
Dark
Teen FictionRayna tries to keep her mood on chill 24/7 but with skin deemed blue-black and with friends that are always surrounded by guys it's hard to do. At her school her complexion is deemed unfit to hang out with her closest friends. She gets her hands on...
