The Hellhound (Riders of Tyr #2 - MC Romance)

36. Night Confessions

Rage

"You never left."

Iris's words resonate in my head. I look down in my arms as she traces the tattoos on my chest. I take one deep breath and swallow. I am scared. I am so scared that she will step back in terror if I tell her the reason I am this fucked-up. She will leave me and that's when the Hellhound will claim me whole, throw my soul into the abyss. But she is my Iris. Mine. She deserves as much.

"I was six," I whisper.

Iris goes rigid in my arms but says nothing.

"I was six and Nate was only three," the memory of my little brother stills wrenches in my very soul. "My Mum..." a lump causes me to stop.

"It's OK," Iris props on her elbows, caressing my cheek.

"It's not. It really isn't," a cruel chuckle slips from my lips.

"You don't have to."

"I do. You are right. I am still there. In that shed, locked away. He has dragged me there, in the shed in backyard, threw me in with Nate. Mum is there, lying on the floor. She is so pretty, black hair, dark eyes. She used to smile at me and Nate all the time. The time that he wasn't around. The mornings. But when his shadow would cast on our doorstep, she would lose that smile. Nate is crying. She calls for Mum but Mum isn't moving. I try, I try to make her look at me but she won't look at me. And all that blood. Blood on her, on me. Only blood, her body cold."

"God," Iris murmurs and holds me tighter.

"Nate sniffles at first. He shakes and glances at Mum now and then. I remember trying the door but it was locked, no windows. We both pee in the corner of the room after holding it for long. Nate doesn't leave my side but all I can do is hold him as we sit next to Mum's body. I am hungry, so hungry. And scared. No one comes for us, not even him. I must have slept cause I remember opening my eyes and Nate is crying. It's the smell. A pungent smell mixed with a tinge of nauseating sweetness. It makes me sick and I take Nate to sit closer to the door, inhaling through the cracks."

"Rage. My Rage. Ryan," I feel wetness on my chest and I know it's Iris crying but I can't stop now.

"Darkness falls and then light. And then darkness again. When the light comes through the cracks, we hear a car in a distance. And then a door opening. We both start screaming as loud as we can. Then some voices and the car driving away. Suddenly a key in the door. He comes in. Angry, fuming. Nate breaks down crying in loud sobs. "Shut up!" but Nate just cries louder. He is holding something. A knife. A big knife. "Shut up!". Mad, so mad. He takes one step and yanks Nate from my arms dropping the knife."

"Don't. Please, don't," Iris begs but I am not here, I am back there, trapped in there.

""Shut up or I will shut you up," he tightens his hands around Nate's neck and I close my eyes. Nate screams for a while. Only when he stops, I open my eyes. He throws him next to Mum as if he was garbage. I move. The knife is in my hand. He turns to me but I plunge the knife in his stomach. Again. And again. He drops on his knees, blood spitting out from his mouth on me, mixing with Mom's dried blood. "That's my boy" is all that he says before I drive the knife through his neck. I sat there till they came for me. They said the smell..."