chapter twentyseven

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This is it. Rock bottom. She was hiding beneath the bleachers, sucking on her last lollypop. It wasn't even a tootsie pop. No yummy candy center. Tutti Fruity for God's sakes. And it smelled under here.

She thought Kell was hard on her. These asses in charge now were relentless. And those damn whistles, if those damn asses in charged blew their damn whistles at her one more time she was going to scream.

Did she even remotely look like she could run five miles? That she wanted to?

She had made it two laps before she ducked under here. So rather it smelled or not, she was staying right here until it was all clear.

It was kind of nice having a few minutes to herself. That was a luxury these days.

When did she go and get some friends?

Her and Hayley were like two peas. Laney was great. Mostly Jess loved trying to corrupt her. She even liked Julian's cheerleader. Meg wasn't as goody two shoes as the last one.

Anytime Jess made it for lunch, Frick and Godrick usually joined them.

Brady Shaw was almost her favorite person in the whole world. Sometimes they could sit and play for hours. Making music, writing songs.

When Mel didn't need her then she was at the studio. Even if they had run out of coke.

Ruff was Ruff. Chris was adorable for someone with a snake tattoo running up his neck. She usually had a thing for drummers.

She still saw Kell everyday but never alone. One hour with a room full of people and problems to talk over, and an hour with Dezrick, Frey and Pensley picking apart everything in her head.

She'd been lucky so far. They weren't getting much more than they'd gotten that first time. The graves. They were always there. Once they'd all saw the back of her dad's head as he walked out the front door.

True to who she was, she caused a big scene and checked out of there early. At least something came of it. They learned not to mention him ever again.

Guess her pain still overrode everything else. It wasn't unusual for Frey to end up with tears in her eyes. Kell did a lot of staring at her. She was getting good at ignoring it.

She couldn't be happier things had cooled between them. For a couple of days things had been intense. Too intense.

Whatever it was, it is gone now. He was back to being an empty slate. She could handle the empty slate. The beautiful but cool and detached eyes.

Mel was doing better. Savion and Kell no longer had to make nightly trips to her house. If and when, she had a bad night Dezrick called for them.

She was doing better thanks to Macie and a little alien boy named Jetidi. Cute kid. Quiet. Watchful. He was the same age as her sister, but his eyes seemed years older. He was kind of freaky. He always seemed to know just what to say to her sister. Always knew what she needed before she said anything.

Now that she thought about it, he was a little too freaky. She wondered if he was a royal.

Her biggest issue right now was trying to figure out how to tell her aunt about the baby. She planned on telling her this weekend. There was no more putting it off. She was lucky no one has let it slip yet. Lucky, that her aunt didn't notice the small changes in her body.

She even had it all set. Mel was staying with Macie and Hayley. If her aunt was going to have a meltdown, she'd rather the booger not be in the house.

This was a lot to put on the older woman. Maybe too much, but neither of them had a choice. A baby was coming.

Once her aunt had been a carefree single and loving it kind of girl. She owed her own restaurant. Then uncle Chad had finally broken down her defenses and made her fall for him.

Talk about relentless. Her, her mom, and her aunt use to sit around laughing at the lengths he'd go to get a date.

That was before her dad ran off. When she thought men didn't leave and marriage meant something.

Just because her dad left, she'd never worried that her uncle Chad would. No one could doubt how much he loved his wife. How much he loved his children and his wife's family.

She never worried about losing Julian.

That was the extent of the men she trusted.

People couldn't understand her and Julian's relationship, well there it was. She could trust him. Of course, he'd been her first. Who else would it have been?

And she hadn't been wrong. It had been amazing, and she knew it was the same for him. Maybe there was no fire. No electricity but they hadn't needed those things. Love, tenderness. Trust. Just as important.

Not that she didn't want those things for him. She wouldn't mind a few sparks herself.

That's why they'd only had those couple of times. That's why they had no intentions of being a couple anytime soon.

They each hoped the other found that little extra.

Her mom said that when her dad kissed her it was like the world stilled for just a moment and life had to catch back up.

Long term wasn't for her. Not unless her and Julian did stop looking for more and decided to get hitch.

Long term was out. Building a life around someone who could up and leave one day? Where was the sense in that? But she did want the fire. Just a taste. To know if it was real or not.

Her drummer boy back home had managed some smoke but no flames. Julian was right, she only dated him because she knew he was safe. There was no way she was going to fall for him.

Her favorite martian was a danger. There were a few fleeting moments when he made her think there could be some sparks.

Sparks? Dead boy? He was like a waterlogged sleeping bag left out at night in the middle of Antarctica. All you were going to get is frostbite. No fire there.

She was laying beneath benchers. Her hair probably full of leaves and who knew what and thinking about an alien who was only one step away from being a cold fish. And worse than that, he was happy being a cold fish.

Rock bottom, for sure. 

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