One Piece Oneshots

July 22 only ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

So it was someone's birthday today. Everyday is someone's birthday. It was The_Black_Mess B-day. And me being an insensitive little shit with a great sense of procrastination and non realistic lemons made a Zoro one dedicated to her. Happy late B-Day.

And also there's a lot of ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  and notes. Because this is a gift and I suck at this and also it's not supposed to be taken serious.
Except the size of someone's  fourth sword. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).

I warned you.

~Begging~

It was you birthday today. During the day, you got gifts from your crew mates, Sanji gave you breakfast Buffet in bed, Nami gave you tangerines and 2,000 Bellie. Robin gave you a large book about (Any Subject) with a certain type of magazine inside ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), Ussop gave you a really cool leather bracelet, Luffy gave you meat, which he pulled out of his pants ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) , Chopper gave you a bag of cotton candy ( Later used in story ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  ), Franky and Brook gave you a song and some panties ( Also later used ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  ).

But one person didn't give you a gift... Your Husband.

Zoro.  ( Also later used in story ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  )

He even avoided you pretty much all day. ( I wonder why ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

At the end of the day, since you didn't like partying, you slipped in the beauty of your (insert possibly sexy sleepwear ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ).

It was awfully silent as you read the smut Robin gave you. Because your a grown woman who can read her smut without caring what others say.  (  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  I wonder what else is not done while reading smut)

Suddenly you hear a knock.

"Come in." You said, flipping through the book.  ( come ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

No answer.

You went to the door and opened to see if anyone was there, the only thing there was a trail of random alcoholic drinks.

None of them said drink me, but you did drink some of the first one anyway.  ( ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I wonder if there was anything in the bottle)

Following it to the end, it led to the male quarters, , which usually smelled like....
Well, di ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) rty old laundry, ( ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  maybe not only that...) Now smelled like roses and what you described as ( ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  )
What a fancy restaurant and wine would smell like.

Once opening door, it was clean, and Zoro ( I told you he would be used later ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  ) was sleeping.... Naked, with only a small towel covering the fourth sword ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), on a nice big bed with rose petals and red velvet sheets.

(  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and also some other stuff for sexy time )

"Zoro? You drunk? On my birthday?" You asked.

His eyes opened as he gave a smirk, winking at you, pulling off the towel and showing you his fourth sword ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).

(  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  also known as the Big Bang )

"Say (y/n)... I haven't talked to you all day, or even gave you your gift... Would you want to have it?" He asked. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

You nodded, having sex with Zoro is great, one of the reasons you married him. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Slowly, he lifted up and cupped your cheek, looking at you before giving you heated kissed as he started undressing you.

Once undressed, he went for your neck, attacking it with no mercy, quickly getting your sweet spot, making you moan.

( And so, the Big Bang hardens ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  )

He sucked like a Marimo vampire, leaving something soon to bruise and look like you got punched.

Somehow managing to lay you on the bed,  he got to your milkshakes ( My milkshakes bring all the Zoros to the yard, and he's like, better the Ero cooks  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ).

Giving them a squeeze, then playing with the nipples, twisting and turning them, sucking and gently bitting, making you go wet down there, ( wet n wild ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  ) you started moaning.

Later on, going to your Mrs. (Mrs. Wet n Horney ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  ) he started rubbing your clitoris.

"Your good at this..." You muttered.

Zoro smirked and went faster, making you an even bigger moaning mess.

After a while, a really good while, you felt the knot getting ready to burst.

"Zoro~" You moaned.

After you came he slid in, pumping hard enough for the bed to squeak ( R.I.P. Bed your not living after Zoros monstrous pumping ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

Zoro going deep enough, hit a certain spot, which you urgently desired him to hit.

"Zoro! There!" You moaned.

While grunted,  he hit it, hard. (Shit your gonna end up in a wheelchair ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  )

After a while you felt a second one coming, you didn't warn him, as your walls closed around his fourth sword ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), he came first, then not a minute later, so did you.

You both panted, Zoro flipped so he could lay down on the bed, still inside you.

After a few minutes he pulled out, laying you beside him and pulling up the covers.

"Nice going. " You told him.

"Nice pussy. Happy birthday." He said, giving you a kiss.

( Nice ass Zoro ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

( Smooth Marimo ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

(Surprised you didn't get lost sliding in reader chan Zoro ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

( Powerful fourth sword ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

(Mihawk is proud  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

~End~

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) This thing count: 30+

Sorry I'm shitty. But Zoro isn't. So yeah. Go on with your lives.