The Dog Walker

Chapter 33

An: warning there is a mention of self harm in this chapter.

"No wonder she cuts, with her mom abandoning her when she was four. She should of cut deeper and killed herself, then mabye we wouldn't have to deal with her crying," Jessica chuckled to her friends. Whispers about me spread through the hall. I brought my sweater to cover up more of my wrist.

I kept my head low as I walked to my locker. Last year it started, grade eight. Well I guess it has always happened at school I just never paid attention to the whispers before, I just guess it finally got to me. I guess word travels even when you go into high school...

Memories flooded back to me, of the whispers. I gulped. I streached my sweater farther down my wrist.

"I never wanted you to kill me, I was trying to make you understand," I told him.

"Thats why you always wear sweaters isn't it," he said softly. I looked away from him and didn't answer. "Why?" I sighed.

"When my mom abandoned me I didn't really know what was happening but as I grew older and as people started to whisper, about how I should have joined my mother or killed myself, I became depressed, I started to believe them. And I'm guessing you know what happened next, I just couldn't take it anymore" I whispered. I rubbed my wrist and turned my head away. "I don't do it anymore but sometimes old thoughts still get to me."

Then he walked up to me, then he wrapped his arms around me in a hug. I hugged him back.

"I'm sorry for everything," he apologized. "I am so sorry." I slowly nodded and pulled away from him. I walked to the bathroom. I looked in the mirror at my throat. It's not bleeding but there is a red mark. How am I going to cover this up? I thought.

Then my mind drifted to what I used to do with the scars on my wrist. I hate makeup but there's nothing more I can do that will hide it fast. I used concealer to hide it. You wouldn't even think there was a knife pressed against my throat. I walked out of the bathroom and back into the kitchen. Adrian walked over to me.

"Listen I need to tell you something. My dad won't be happy with it, hell he'll be furious, but I'm quitting being a hunter," he told me.

"Wow, that's a big thing. I'm glad, like really glad," I said with a smile.

"Yeah, although it won't change what I've already done," he said guiltily. "I am really sorry for what I did to him." He's meaning Shaw.

"Just don't bring it up again," I said, more sharply then I intended.

"Sorry," he murmured and walked off. I watched him go and I felt a stab of guilt. But didn't try to call him back. Then I heard the front door open. I walked through the living room to the front door. It's mom, she's carrying bags of food.

"Do you have my chocolate?" I asked, licking my lips. She glared at me. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding." I grabbed some of the bags from her and carried them into the kitchen with mom following close behind. I helped her unpack the food.

"Thanks for helping me, and here is your reward," she thanked me then handed me a huge Arrow chocolate bar.

"Thank you so much! Your the best!" I exclaimed. I grabbed the Arow bar and hugged her tightly.

"Can't. Breath," mom said. I let her go.

"Oh sorry, well I'm going upstairs to eat this. Good night peoples," I said and ran to my bedroom.

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I walked along the side walk. I felt my feet walking to a allyway, the allyway. I stood in the entrance to it, it's dark but if I looked harder I can make out a shape. I walked closer to it to realize it's a person. He looks like Shaw.

"Shaw? Is that you?" I called to him. As I got closer I realized it is Shaw. My eyes widened and a smile formed on my face. I ran up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Shaw! It's you, your back!" He turned around to face me. He's pail, very pail. His shirt is bloody around his heart and it looks like he got shot. I gasped.

"Oh look at this, if it isn't Asena. So I heard that right after I saved you, you hooked up with that werewolf. Hm, forget about me pretty fast eh," he said cheerfully. I felt a stab of guilt and I frowned.

"It wasn't like that. Please understand that-" I started to say but then he cut me off.

"So I guess the shcool rumors where true. You really are a slut! Going from boy to boy, if one dies you just go to the next," he said in a sing song voice. I shook my head, I can feel tears starting to slip down my face.

"Your not real, your not actually here. This isn't real," I whispered.

"Thats where your wrong, I'm as real as when you let. Me. Die," he whispered. Then he turned to dust.

I woke up, sweating, tears streaming down my face. No, no, no it can't be true. It couldn't of actually been him I thought. I sat up and quickly whipped the tears from my eyes, but they just kept coming. He's right, isn't he. Shaw, Jessica they are all right about me...