The City | GirlxGirl

twenty one ➳

Blair hated being out past sunset. Something about the city gave her a chill no jacket could cure. The fear of being attacked or hit by a car or something you read in the newspaper was strong enough to make her hands shake, and as she realized that they were, in fact, shaking now, just as the sun dipped gently beneath the horizon, she tucked them into the front pockets of her jeans. Even with Skylar at her side, she couldn't talk herself out of being frightened. There were too many unknowns about being in the city at night, and all of them crept up Blair's shoulders, their claws sharp within her skin.

"I am starving," Skylar said slowly, dragging out her words, just like she dragged out her long strides towards the familiar diner.

It was where they had spent most nights after Logan's death. Blair winced at the memory. Although Skylar thought that she was over it, that she had buried her grief just like they had buried Logan, even the thought of her best friend and what came after her best friend's death pained her. Painful memories, every one of them. Skylar was solid, a brick wall. Nothing could break her. Other than this. So Blair had to pretend to be strong for her, even if that meant hiding how much she was still hurting whenever she thought of Logan.

Blair didn't reply, but instead gave Skylar a thin smile to let her know she was listening. Listening, but drifting. Letting her mind wander far above their heads; thoughts playing in the clouds that supposedly were now home to Logan.

"It's starting to get warmer." Now Skylar was just commentating the short walk from the bar to the diner, just speaking to hear her own voice. She was saying things like "that shop hasn't been open for months" and "did you see that guy's hat?"

But now Blair wasn't listening. It must have been the anxiety she already felt sauntering around in the city while it was pitch black outside. She felt on edge; hands shaking, eyes darting back and forth along the sidewalk they strolled down. Alert. Ready to pull Skylar out of the way of an oncoming distracted driver if she had to.

She would never show it in front of Skylar, but she was still struggling with the haunting that arrived in their lives four years ago.

-

Fidgeting. Squirming. Whatever you wanted to call it, Blair was doing it. She couldn't sit still in the booth that was stained by an infinite number of ketchup and mustard spills and sweaty teenagers. For some people, this diner was a place for fun, for being with people. For letting your mind wander, having a break from reality, as Blair's had on the walk there. But for Skylar and Blair, this diner was a place where memories swarmed them like ghosts. They had spent their darkest nights here, together. And although they had been back plenty of times since those heartbroken sunsets, the diner still called out to them, their pain playing on a loop like the radio that danced discreetly over the room.

"We didn't have to come here," said Skylar. Blair hated that she had picked up on her discomfort. She was supposed to be the strong one.

She shrugged, pretending it was no big deal. Maybe Skylar would think she was cold rather than haunted.

"What are you getting?"

"Bacon and eggs."

Skylar smiled lightly, a single eyebrow raising a millimetre. "Breakfast for dinner, as always?"

Blair nodded, and couldn't help but share the warm grin that Skylar wore. "As always," she repeated.

They didn't need menus when they had spent so many consecutive nights here. They had either ordered everything on the menu, or only a glass of water, while they sat in a sticky booth and waited for 1AM to come so they would be kicked out, and get lost, having nowhere to go and no one to see.