Love over Hate

Beach Side

Groaning, you pressed your palms to your eyes, trying to block the bright light shining through the window. Muttering under your breath, you turned to your side, wanting to cuddle up against Jared's warmth, hoping you could go back to sleep.

The side of the bed was cool, no residual watch from your personal furnace of a boyfriend. Waking up fully, you winced at the pounding headache you felt as soon as you sat up.

"Jared?" You called out, your vision clearing enough to recognize you weren't in your trailer. Neither were you at Jared's house. As the fog began to lift from your brain, memories of last night came fleeting back in. Visions of Jared's face as he said those dreaded words. You remembered the bottle of whiskey that you had emptied.

With a groan, you even remembered your hast decision to quit your job, yelling at your bosses before striding out.

"What have I done?" You muttered, just a light knock sounded on the door. Stumbling out of your bed, you opened the door to see the kind lady from the night before holding a tray out in front of her.

"Good morning, hope I didn't wake you." She said, her voice chipper. "I just knew you would be needing a good breakfast after your rough night."

Setting the tray down on the small table, she went to the patio doors, pushing back the curtains until your room was filled with light. Blinking against the intrusion, you reached down for the cup of coffee, only to have your hand swatted away.

"First this." She ordered, handing you a glass of water and some aspirin. "This will help your headache."

Downing the pills and water in one shot, you turned to glance at her. "Why are you being so nice to me? You don't even know me!"

"True. I don't know you. But you seem like someone who needs a friend." She answered. "Now enjoy your breakfast, then get yourself into the beach. A little beach always makes everything better." She insisted before leaving the room.

As soon as she was gone, you sat down at the table, the food in front of you smelling wonderful, even with your hangover. Munching on the food, you picked up your phone, afraid to see what would be on it. Pressing the button, you were met with nothing but a black screen. Searching through your purse, you tossed it down, realizing you had no charger with you.

With the beach beckoning you, you quickly hopped in the shower, your hangover slowly fading away. Dressing in your clothes room yesterday, you grabbed your key card,  stepping out into the chilly air.

The walk felt good, the cool air refreshing you more than anything else had, and by the time you reached the mall, you were feeling hopeful that everything was going to work out.

Hitting the clothing store first, you picked up some simple clothes and underwear. Passing by the swimsuit section, you nibbled on your lip, undecided. Finally you grabbed the clearance one, a simple black one piece. A sweatshirt was the last thing you bought in this store before you made your way to the main store at the other end. There you picked up much needed items, including a charger for your phone. Grabbing some snack items as well, you began the tedious process of lugging them back to your room.

Charging your phone as soon as you got back, you changed into your swimsuit. Leaving your room behind you went out to the isolated beach, surprised to see you were alone.

The wind coming off the water was brisk, blowing your hair back from your face. Settling your blanket on the sand, you walked out to the water,   letting your feet acclimate to the cold water.

Stepping out farther into the water, you ducked underneath, your breath catching as the cold water ran over your body.

The water was too cold to stay in for long, and soon you were back on your blanket, a towel wrapped around your shoulders.

With your arms wrapped around your knees, you stared off into the choppy waters letting your mind wander.

A part of you wished you had never been cast as a special guest on the show Supernatural. Then you would never have met Jared, and your heart wouldn't have gone through all the pain these past couple of weeks.

Even thinking about Jared made a tear slip down your cheek, and you hastily brushed it away. None of that mattered anymore. You were gone from Supernatural, and your acting chances probably gone with it.

Your relationship with Jared was probably shot as well. Even if they had forced him to break up with, things had been said,  hearts had been broken. It would be hard coming back from that.

It took you a minute to realize that one tear had turn into a hundred, your hands soaked with the salty tears.

With your heart still as heavy before, you knew the best thing for you would be to break all ties. To leave Vancouver, head somewhere where the likelihood of running into Jared once again were slim.

Dusting off your hands, you stood up, ready to gather your items and head back to downtown Vancouver. Jared would no doubtedly be filming, and you still had a key to his place. You could easily pack your items, and be gone before he made it home.

With heartbroken determination, you gathered up your blanket, hugging it to your chest as you stared out at the ocean. The waves called to you, a symbol of your turbulent life, and for a split second, you wanted to let them swallow you whole.

Shaking the maudlin thoughts away from your mind, you went back into your room, cleaning off the salty ocean water before slipping into the oversized sweatshirt and leggings.

Sitting down on your bed, you opened your fully charged phone, ready to face the negativity that was no doubt the majority of your notifications.

Right away your notifications started ringing, messages after message popping up on your screen. Missed calls, voice mails and text messages piled up. You saw messages from Jared, Jensen, even Gen. A couple of phone calls from the main office of Supernatural.

It was overwhelming, and you were about ready to just delete everything when a new message from Jared came in. With your hand shaking, you pressed open, afraid to read what was on the screen.

"Please, let me know you're okay. Just a word, a symbol. Anything to let me know that you're alive and holed up somewhere. I'm so freaking scared. Please Baby."