My Songs

Untitled

(Verse 1)
My aspirations surpass my motivation
But I always get these dark sensations
What if you arent good enough?
What if
What if
The heaviness in my chest only grows
But my sadness overflows
The feeling of uselessness becomes my best friend
Until I can soon find someone in the end
As I stare into the clouds
The sun slowly falls down
And another day of my life
Has wasted away

(Chorus)
Why does it hurt so much?
What is this pain?
This unknown feeling drives me insane
I try to feel alright
But My efforts don't take flight
Is it all even worth it
Or are my feelings just wreaking havoc?
I need answers, A flag, a sign
Because I don't know what to do this time
My thoughts are a mess, can't think straight
I'm making no sense, ugh, I just hate it
I just want to know, is he the one?
Or am I getting my hopes up just for fun

(Verse 2)
I can't even tell if im denying my feelings
Or whether or not they're even there
Because my mind and my heart are a confused pair
Just a pair
Just a pair
All I want is someone to hold me
But My desires in one don't exist
So I mope around all day and night
Internally trying to pick a fight
Are you the one I'm looking for?
Or are you just another page model that my heart falls for?

(Chorus)
Why does it hurt so much?
What is this pain?
This unknown feeling drives me insane
I try to feel alright
But My efforts don't take flight
Is it all even worth it
Or are my feelings just wreaking havoc?
I need answers, A flag, a sign
Because I don't know what to do this time
My thoughts are a mess, can't think straight
I'm making no sense, ugh, I just hate it
I just want to know, is he the one?
Or am I getting my hopes up just for fun

(Bridge)
It hurts okay!
I know you don't understand
But I'm just so weak, I can barely stand
Go on, make fun of me
Laugh in my face
The taunting only defines your face
Because all i wanna know is if he's the one
And all I really want is for there to be someone
But life isn't like that dear self
It only gets worse once your heart yelps
So here I lay
Lonely and afraid
With an anchor on my chest
Enduring the pain
Nothing will get better
I know it wont
I just can't move on from this loss of hope

(Chorus)
Why does it hurt so much?
What is this pain?
This unknown feeling drives me insane
I try to feel alright
But My efforts don't take flight
Is it all even worth it
Or are my feelings just wreaking havoc?
I need answers, A flag, a sign
Because I don't know what to do this time
My thoughts are a mess, can't think straight
I'm making no sense, ugh, I just hate it
I just want to know, is he the one?
Or am I getting my hopes up just for fun

(End of Song)

EDITED VERSION

(Verse 1)
My aspirations surpass my motivation
But I always get these dark sensations
What if you arent good enough?
What if
What if
The heaviness in my chest only grows
But my sadness overflows
The feeling of uselessness becomes my best friend
Until I can soon find someone in the end
As I stare into the clouds
The sun slowly falls down
And another day of my life
Has wasted away

(Chorus)
Why does it hurt so bad?
What is this pain?
This peculiar feeling drives me insane
I try to say I feel alright
But I know that I can't lie
I just need answers, a flag, a sign
Because I don't know what to do this time
My thoughts are a mess
I'm making no sense
I can't think straight
I'm full of emotional hate
I just want to know, is he the one
Or are my hopes up just for fun?

(Verse 2)
I can't even tell if im denying my feelings
Or whether or not they even exist
My mind and heart are lost in a deep abyss
Abyss
Abyss
All I want is someone to hold me
But my desires in a person aren't real
So I mope around all day and night
Internally trying to pick a fight
Are you the one I'm looking for?
Or are you another page model my heart falls for?
I just want this longing to go away
But I know it'll last for another day

(Chorus)
Why does it hurt so bad?
What is this pain?
This peculiar feeling drives me insane
I try to say I feel alright
But I know that I can't lie
I just need answers, a flag, a sign
Because I don't know what to do this time
My thoughts are a mess
I'm making no sense
I can't think straight
I'm full of emotional hate
I just want to know, is he the one
Or are my hopes up just for fun?

(Bridge)
It hurts okay!
I know you don't understand
But I'm just so weak, I can barely stand
Go on, make fun of me
Laugh in my face
The taunting only defines your awful face
All i wanna know is if he's the one
Because all I really want is for there to be someone
But life isn't like that, I know all too well
I kniw it only gets worse once your heart cries for help
So here I lay
Lonely and afraid
With an anchor on my chest
Enduring the pain
Nothing will get better
I know it wont
I just can't move on from this loss of hope

(Chorus)
Why does it hurt so bad?
What is this pain?
This peculiar feeling drives me insane
I try to say I feel alright
But I know that I can't lie
I just need answers, a flag, a sign
Because I don't know what to do this time
My thoughts are a mess
I'm making no sense
I can't think straight
I'm full of emotional hate
I just want to know, is he the one
Or are my hopes up just for fun?

(Optional Outro)
Is he the one?
Is he the one?
Is he the one I'm longing for?
Or am I just dragging my heart along the floor?

(End of Song)

Written/Edited on July 29, 2017

~~~~~~
The reason i haven't posted anything in almost three months is because I have just had a huge mental block for songwriting. And i just couldn't write anything. But, whenever I actually got ideas, I couldn't form them into words, and I couldn't write them down. Two weeks ago, I was realising that I was actually mildly depressed, which is easy to come out of, because its not a heavy depression. So, it was easy for me to snap out of it. Once I did, i regained hope and motivation to do most things, including writing songs. So I just wrote ideas upon ideas, and i tried to form them into a song. The lines were decent, but it just turned into a huge poem because I was overthinking, and trying to sound good, and when I do that, I tend to do too much, and just Fuck it up. So, I kind of just lost my motivation again there because I kept doubting myself, and I wasn't getting the feedback I wanted to hear. So, today, I just had a wave of sadness engulf me for no reason. I have an idea why, but, it just got me really down. So I tried to explain how I felt, which became this song. Luckily, this one isn't a poem. I know songs and poems are basically the sane, but I don't consider them the same. There is a difference. When I think about writing a poem, i suck at it, and can't do it. But when I think I'm writing a song, but over analyse, it turns into a good poem. Which I don't like because I want to be a songwriter, NOT a poet. But this song dleant fall into the poem category thankfully. I just think the ideas are jumbled together, and are clashing. But since I haven't posted anything on hete, I figured I might as well see what people think of this, and see what critiques I get because I know it doesn't make much sense, and I know I didn't explain how I felt very well. I doubt anyone will actually read it because it's been so long, but thank you to those who do. Sorry for the life story essay. But I hope you enjoy it(the song). Please vote, and comment. Much love ❤