Dragon Dreams

Chapter 6: Family Matters (1/2)

My talons made staccato clicks on the wood surface as I descended the stairs to join my family at the kitchen table. I was nervous. An uneasy quiet had taken over the room as I sat down. I blinked my golden eyes and looked at the others. Mom had one hand, laced with Dad's, resting on the table. The other played restlessly with her hair. Dad frowned at the ice melting in his glass.

Alex gave me a little smile. "A little nervous, huh? It's pretty easy to read you now."

"What?" I replied, a little confused.

"Your ears are flatter than they were earlier, and your tail movements are kinda stiff. Must be some unconscious emotional response."

"Oh," I said, a little taken aback. "Well, I guess I am a little on edge. This whole conversation is probably going to touch on some difficult stuff. But I realize we have to talk about these things."

"First, I think we've got a couple more things to ask you," Mom said. "Like, I guess, we were wondering, what does it feel like, being a dragon? Is it just your mind in a different body?"

I thought about it for a few seconds, wondering if I should tell them about my predatory, dragon-like thoughts when I was hungry. I decided the best way to proceed was with honesty, so I said "Almost. Most of the time, it's just like you said, my mind in this body." I paused and shifted slightly in my chair. "And I don't want to scare you or anything, but sometimes, there's a difference. Thoughts coming out of nowhere, like an instinct that wasn't there before. This morning, when I was feeling really hungry, there was this urge to go hunting. The best way to describe it, I think, is like this: a little part of my mind really thinks it's a wild dragon.

"That might also explain why I can, without really thinking about it, move all my limbs pretty naturally and not trip over my tail. There's a part of my brain that knows how a dragon should move and think. But I can tell you for sure that I'm in control of everything. I'm not worried about getting a slight urge to hunt here and there, I'll just have to deal with it." I tried to sound as confident as possible. Though, the truth was I had no clue how strong the dragon in my head was or what it was capable of.

My parents seemed a little concerned by this. "I'm really glad you told us," Mom said, "and I'm glad you feel like it's under control. Even if it does make me worry about you a little. I mean, this is something that you've never had to deal with—something in inside your head that's not totally you."

On the inside, I felt a bit guilty. The last thing I wanted was to make everybody around me worried all the time. I tried to change the subject. "Yeah, well, I'll try my best to get used to it. Was there something else you wanted to ask?"

It was Dad's turn to speak this time. "Son, I know you said earlier that you don't know about any other dragons that exist. But, if you find out that there are some, you will tell us, right? If it's important for you to meet others of your kind, we want to make that happen."

"Let me just say," I said quickly, "as far as I'm concerned, dragons aren't 'my kind.' I really want to think of myself as a human. I don't know, maybe I'm scared of losing more than I have already. Look at me, I'm walking on two legs and trying to wear clothes. Despite my appearance, I want to hold on to my humanity more than anything." My voice sort of trailed off as I lowered my solemn gaze to look at the table.

"Hey, Josh," my sister said, "don't worry about losing anything. We know exactly who you are. I don't want there to be any doubt in your mind. If you think that we won't see you as the same person, forget it. That's all I have to say."

Her words sounded so adamant, and they made me feel a bit better. I looked into her eyes and saw some protective fire. I gave her a little smile, knowing my big sister would always be there for me.

"Really well said, Alex," Mom added. "We feel the same way. It's a little hard for us at the moment. There's just so much to process. But we can still see our son sitting right here. Whatever you need from us, to feel more..." she paused, "normal, just let us know."

There was one thing I needed that came to mind. I held up my claws. "Having these now means I can't use the screen on my phone. If you go out later, could you get me a stylus or something? Also, I could use a few more large pairs of shorts."

"Sure, that's the least we can do," my dad said. "We'll probably run out later and grab a few things."

"Thanks," I said. Looking down at my notes, I saw there was one glaring issue that still needed to be brought up: dealing with the outside world. It was finally time to bite the bullet since it wouldn't get any easier to deal with the longer I ignored it. My paws fidgeted nervously and smoothed the paper on the table in front of me while I took a slow breath. "So, I guess the next thing I want to talk about is all that out there." I motioned to the nearby covered window and the world beyond. "Obviously, nobody out there has any idea that I exist. And there are a couple ways to deal with that. Do we keep it the way it is, and make sure that people don't find out about me? Or do we somehow come up with a way to let me out without starting a panic?"

The response around the table was shifting glances and general unease. Dad sipped his water and set the glass back on the table with unnecessary care, barely making a sound. Alex's eyes bored into a spot on the far wall, over Mom's head.

"Well, of course, we don't want to cause a panic," my mom finally said. "And we want to, um, get your input on this as well. It's just..." She was visibly struggling to articulate herself as tactfully as possible, "...just so important to us that you stay safe, Josh. And I know it might sound awful, but there are so many unknowns out there right now. It would be a huge risk—"

"I get it," I said flatly, cutting her off. "It's okay. This is pretty much how I thought it would be. At least for a while." My body went a little numb. I considered the notion of hiding to be loathsome and unfair. But if I stepped back, I could see it was probably for the best, to keep my family and me safe.

"No, wait," Alex began, "we're seriously just going to lock him up? Why the hell can't we just take it slow and let him try to have a normal life?"

"Nobody is saying we should lock Josh up," Mom said, her tone rising just the slightest bit. "All I'm advocating is caution. How can we possibly predict what will happen? Where's the handbook for this? I don't want my son taken away from me the moment people find out about him just because they're scared. Because, if there's one thing people are always good at, it's overreacting to unfamiliar things with fear."

Everything my mom said was right. The worst case scenario was my discovery bringing an angry mob to our house to take me god-knows-where. People could get hurt. What if I was attacked? Would the dragon inside me take over? What if I accidentally lost control and killed someone? These questions made me more anxious and drove me to think more favorably of staying hidden.

"And it won't be total isolation," Dad added. "Nothing as extreme as that. We'll still find a way for you to see your friends. I'm sure we can find a way to get you back outside too. This is probably only a temporary precaution."

Alex stared at her hands folded on the table in front of her. "Well, I still don't like the sound of it," she said. "It just feels wrong after all he's been through."

"Yeah, it's definitely not ideal," I said. "But the important points have already been made. We have to look at the big picture."

Mom reached out a hand and placed it tenderly on my arm. The scales didn't seem to bother her at all. "It'll be okay, Josh," she said. "You're strong. You'll get through this. We all will."

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