So I went over to Gabe's. I just knocked on the door and his mother answered. We had a nice conversation and then I went to see him. He was with one of his other friends and they were watching some boring movie on Netflix.
I felt so awkward intruding but I just did it and confidently pulled up a chair next to him and his cute friend whom apparently has a girlfriend.
I wanted to hug and give him a kiss to make up for all the hurt I caused him. Because I know I hurt him a lot with my awful messages. Half the time I don't know why I send the messages I send. It's just an act of impulse. I have poor coping skills. When I get angry, I get angry. Yeah, I really gotta work on myself.
But after tonight, I feel better. We didn't necessarily talk things out. We ended up having sexual intercourse as things got very intense. It was as if he didn't want me there but then he did. I wasn't too sure if he seemed happy or not. But I stayed at his place and did what I wanted to do for sooo long.
His friend ended up leaving and the plans they had got cancelled probably because of me and how awkward I was making everything. His friend probably felt like a third wheel because of the things I was doing to Gabe out of spite as he was trying to watch his movie. These things include tickling, poking, and texting him non-stop. To be honest, I would have felt like a third wheel too.
We had sex, went to Mcdonald's where he bought us both food, and then back to my place. He wanted to make sure I arrived home safely which was very thoughtful of him. I've never had a guy in my life care sooo much for me that sometimes I wonder if I'm dreaming. Normally, this never happens. Usually, I'm the one that only cares about me. That's it.
And that was my day.
I took a risk and walked from my house to Gabe's, wanting to talk things out in person because text messaging is honestly the worst form of communication. I'm so proud of myself for doing this. Now, I just have to make amends with other people...
Wish me luck.
~
