Who did this? {Billdip fanfiction}

Chapter 4

---Mabel's POV---
It's been 3 weeks and Dipper hasn't changed. He sits and looks out the window all day. Stan decided that after the first week and a half that Dipper needed help. The psychiatrist came to the Shack and started asking questions. Dr. Madmins talked to Dipper as if he was a baby deer.
---flashback---
I was hiding in the closet. I couldn't leave Dipper alone and I had to know what this "doctor" was going to do.
"Dipper," Dr. Madmins cooed, "Dipper do you mind if I ask you a few questions?" He waited for a response. Tough luck with that. Dipper only seemed to pay attention and answer to me.
"Dipper, it's very rude not to answer someone when they talk to you. Now, Dipper can you tell me a little bit about yourself?"
It went like that back and forth. The shrink would ask a question and wait for Dipper to respond. When he didn't he moved on to the next question. Until Dr. Madmins left the room and went to talk to Gruncle Stan.
---end of flashback---
The shrink prescribed anti depressants and recommended that we just continue to talk to him. He said that Dipper has become depressed and appears to be showing signs of being apathetic. He's falling back to old patterns. I put on a smile to mask my sadness and marched up to our room.
"Hey Dipper!" He was still sitting at the window sill, "Dip'n'Dots it's like 98 degrees in here. Why are you wearing long sleeves?" He didn't look at me but, he did flinch instead.
"Any way I was thinking about get ice cream today. You and me. And..." I started choking on my words. Stupid nerves! It's just a name! "I was thinking that...um...Pacifica could come along as well. We've been texting each other a lot lately. I don't know how it happened but it did. I've come to view her as a close friend." Close friends can hold hands. Close friends can...can kiss. Right? Yeah. Totally.
"So, what'd you say? Come on!" I was starting to get angry. Angry at myself for my confused feelings and angry at Dipper.
"Dipper, I need you to say something to me. I kinda need a brother right now. Not a ghost!" I shut my mouth and covered it with my hands. What did I just say!? What did I just do!? How am I supposed to get Dipper to forgive me?
"Dip...I'm so...so sorry. It's just that I'm confused and angry right now. And...and I could really use some comfort from you." I was crying, "Dipper, please look at me. Please react. Get...get angry, get sad, express yourself. Please. I need you." I was sobbing. My knees gave out beneath me and I fell to the ground. The entire time Dipper just looked out the window. He revealed nothing on what he felt. Nothing. His eyes just looked out the window as if I never said anything.
---Dipper's POV---
"Dipper, I need you to say something to me. I kinda need a brother right now. Not a ghost!" Mabel yelled.
I knew it. She never really cared about me. She just wanted me because she needed someone to talk to. Whatever it's not like that's a big surprise or anything. She hasn't changed.
I tuned her out and focused on looking out the window. I just don't care about my family, my summer, my life. I feel like I should but, I just can't. My arms were burning and itched from what I did this morning.
---le flashback---
I woke up panting. I feel like I had a nightmare but, I couldn't remember it. I remember the feeling though. This feeling of uneasiness. Of panic. The clock read 5:38 AM. I went downstairs and grabbed a slice of bread. The utensils drawer was cracked open catching my attention because everything else was closed. I walked over to the drawer and pulled out one of the knives. Downing all my bread I pressed the blade against my thumb. Blood emerged and started trickling down my hand. The sensation it gave me was incredible. I wanted more. I needed more. I dragged the knife making a slit on my left forearm. The cut was shallow but, enough to draw blood. I did it again and again and again. Until I heard Gruncle Stan start waking up. Grabbing a rag and soaked it with water and scrubbed the floor where the blood fell on. Then took the rag and pressed it against my arm. In a hurried pace I went up stairs and bandaged my arm with gauze. Then I put on a sweater Mabel made for me on our 9th birthday.
---end of flash back---
My forearm burned but, I loved the way it felt. It made me feel alive. It made me feel better. Like the tension in a room full of people who hate each was released. I hid the knife under the bathroom sink behind all the cleaning products that no one has bothered to use. The only other thing I was think of was if I was going to have another nightmare. The ones I use to have were about my parents. The ones I'm having now are about me. Granted both are technically about me but, the ones I'm having now are more directed towards me. Soon my eyelids were dropping closed and I nodded off to sleep.