Who did this? {Billdip fanfiction}

Chapter 9

---Dipper's POV---
"D-dipper, w-what are you doing?" A shaky voice ask. I stop cutting my arm and turn to see Bill looking at me.
"So that's what you pocketed in the dream. You pocketed a blade. Why would you self harm when your parents and bullies already hurt you. You are hurting and you choose to hurt more? I don't get it. Why?" Bill was crying. Why does he care so much?
"I've learned over the years that once you get burned by the fire so much. You learn to embrace it." I drag the knife on my forearm.
"Please sto-" I cut him off before he could finish,
"Why do people live? Why do they chose to continue living?" Cut, "I've noticed a pattern. You get old and you get replaced." Cut, "Tell me Bill how will my death affect anything?" I drag the knife along my arm. Adding another slit to my arm. I do it again and again. Bill stood where he was and then finally spoke,
"Your famil-" I send an icy glare his way and he stops talking.
"My family? Really my family? You've seen my nightmares. That wasn't even the worst things they've don to me. Mabel will move on. She already has. Gruncle Stan wants to get rid of me. Don't deny it. He's contemplating sending me to a mental hospital. My parents," I let out a ragged breath, "My parents don't even care about what happens to me as long as no one knows about my scar collection. They've neglected me. They've abused me. The only person they love aside from themselves is Mabel. You know, I wasn't a natural genius. I was dumb. You want to know how I became so smart? I threw myself into my school work because it was my only escape. The highest A's, science fair awards, brilliance awards. Anything to get praise from my parents. To them I was nothing but, a nuisance. I learned how to cook for myself when I was six. Course it never really mattered. I was already adapted to having little to no food." I was crying. I've never told anybody about this,
"The only clothing I got was on holidays from relatives. If Mabel didn't want something it went in the trash and I end to go get it later." I was pressing the blade deeper into my skin. Tears blurred my vision,
"You want to know the truth I realized. I realized that if I was already dead on the inside then dying in the outside wouldn't matter. Now it's my turn for a question. Will you miss me when I'm dead?" Before I could hear his answer the blood loss and lack of food caught up with me. Slowly the curtain closed over my eyes.
---Bill's POV---
"Will you miss me when I'm dead?" He asked. Not out of spite or anger but, out of sincerity. Before I could form an answer Dipper fell to the ground.
"Dipper! Hang on. I've got, you okay? Stay with me! Sana eo! Salvum illum! Non placeat tibi perdere!" I chanted. My powers surged and I healed his wounds and replenished his blood. He still needs to eat. Snapping my fingers I teleported us to his room. I laid him down on the bed. I grabbed the sandwich and kneeled down next to him.
"Evigilare faciatis." I whispered into his ear. He was gasping for air as his eyes flew open. He was scared and confused about what was going on.
"Hey. Hey. Calm down. It's alright. You're not in a hospital. Your in you room. And unless you want to go to a hospital I suggest you keep it down."
He was panting. Desperate for air.
"Dipper. Look at me. You need to calm down. You're safe. Only you and I know about what has just happened. Okay?"
He nodded his head and he started taking deep breaths.
"Dipper. You need to eat. You have to eat." I try to give him the sandwich but, he wouldn't take it.
"Dipper, please. I don't want you to die. I figured out the answer to your question. I wouldn't miss you when your dead because I won't let you die." I took a bit of the sandwich and before Dipper could react I kissed him. The shock was apparent and his jaw dropped. And I pushed the food I bit off into his mouth. I pulled away and clamped a hand over his mouth forcing him to swallow.
"Now, do I have to do that again and again until you do it on your own?" He was still shocked. I was about to take another bit before he extended his hand. I smiled at him and gave him the sandwich. He took a few bites before he pushed it away. He needs to adapt to eating again so, I didn't push him on eating more.
He seemed tired but, he didn't want to go to sleep. Like I'm going to let that happen. I got in the bed and wrapped my arms around him. He was so cold.
"B-bill what are you doing?" He tried to squirm out of my grasp. Tried.
"Oh, hush. You need to relax and go to sleep." After a few minutes the tension relaxed in his body.
"Bill can I tell you something before I go to sleep." He said dreamily.
"Sure."
"You wanted to know why I was cutting. At first..." He was on the brink of sleep, "A-at first it was because it made me feel better. Then I was cutting for what made me feel that way in the first place." He's breath slowed and became a steady rhythm. I was so shocked. Tears fell down my face and a nestled closer to Pinetree. I made sure that he had a good dream. Before I fell asleep too.