Speech |a.f.i au|

0.4

Getting on Temazepam knocked me out. It was my first time having a full night sleep in weeks. Everything felt great until I forced myself out of bed and watched the room begin to turn while my stomach twisted. I fell back onto my bed and called my mom.

"I love you, but you're not staying here if you're feeling dizzy," she demanded and I groan in protest. In what world would someone refuse for their seventeen-year-old daughter to stay home, alone. "I'll go call Mrs. Hemmings, and see if she'd be okay with having you over."

"Mom," I groan, throwing my blanket over my head. She walks out of my room to call Mrs. Hemmings, I assume. I close my eyes and try to prevent myself from vomiting.

My phone buzzes and kept my eyes closed, popping my hand out from under my covers and grabbing my device.

I squint my eyes when I see the screen and notice I have a text from Luke.

Luke

Luke: aye ur coming over :-)

Me: and ur going to school

Luke: nah, ma told me to stay home and watch you while she goes to work

Me: anyone else there?

Luke: nope. dad's still on his "business trip"

Luke: well hold on idk Ashton is supposed to come cause he only goes to school half days typically, so he might just skip

My heart skips a beat and I close my eyes. Until my phone buzzes again and it's a text from Mia.

Mia

Mia: hey girly, so are you still planning on coming to my party?

Me: yeah

Mia: yay! is michael coming

Me: I'll ask him gor you

Me: for*

Why do people start talking to me when  I don't wanna be talked to?

My mom comes into my room and sits on my bed, ripping the covers away from my face. Her hand runs down my arm and I see that she's on the phone.

"Yeah, her skin is pretty clammy," she says into the phone. A moment of silence passes before she replies to whoever she was talking to, "Okay, yeah. I will. Thank you, Dr. Brigs. We'll see you next Thursday." she hangs up the phone before telling me not to have sex or do drugs, as well as get ready.

...

"Rene!" Ashton shouted when he saw me laying on the couch. I knit my eyebrows together, curious as to why he's taking such a big interest in me. 

"Well hello to you too," Luke says, clearly offended. He shuts the door and sits on the end of the couch, by my feet.

"Can you lift your head up?" Ashton asks. I sit myself up and Ashton immediately sits down, where my head once was. Though, he wraps his arm around the top of my chest and presses my body down so my head is laying in his lap.

Luke is on his phone, so it's no secret that he's bored. Ashton uses one of his hands to run through my tangled brown hair. His fingers are gentle as he softly pulls apart the tangles in my hair.

Despite finding this relaxing, I can't ignore the perspiration from my palms and how fast my heart is racing. My stomach is twisting and no, I don't have butterflies, I feel like I'm going to vomit on him.

I close my eyes and try to relax my body, just focusing on my breathing and Ashton's hands. My body becomes limp and I drift off to sleep.

...

I did all I could do to ignore Ashton for the rest of the week. To other people, it may not have seemed intimate, but it was to me. Not only so,  I was extremely embarrassed because I couldn't even muster a sentence to him, and hardly a word at that.

After I woke up, I noticed that Ashton was gone. His hands disappeared from my hair and my head laid upon a pillow rather than his lap. To be quite honest, I felt rather upset that he wasn't there.

Currently, I'm sitting in English class. Luke and Abbey were arguing, once again and to be quite honest I didn't want to listen to it.

"Can you all shut up?" I raise my voice, and for some reason, I don't stutter. I feel proud of myself until I realize that the class is silent and everyone is looking at me.

I keep myself from screaming and I try to prevent myself from crying. Abbey's mouth hangs open while Luke's eyes are wide.

The teacher gulps and then continues his lesson, ignoring the tension in the room. I can feel my chest rising and falling at an uneven pace. Luke's hand presses to the small of my back and he gives me a reassuring smile.

"I'm sorry," Abbey mutters, looking down. I feel bad for her. Although she can be quite annoying, Luke treated her badly and I can tell that it really put her down. Madi looks at Abbey with empathy, before giving her a pat on the shoulder.

"Me too," Luke says, removing his hand from my back and grabbing his pencil.

"I'm having a small get-together, you know, for all the Speech and Debate people. It's actually tonight. Are you guys up for joining?" Abbey asks, quietly. Madi looks at me and I give her a nod, indicating that I would go.

"Rene and I are up for it." she gives Abbey a smile and we all look at Luke, making him groan.

"Yes, I'll go. But can my friends come?" Abbey nods towards him and Luke grabs his phone and texts in the group chat.

I don't look at my phone because I then realize that my plan to ignore Ashton was going down the drain.

"I'm sorry it's so short notice, I'm usually not like this, but it's to help get to know each other better." I look down at my English assignment and begin writing, tuning everyone out. Though, after a few minutes, I feel Madi kick my shins. I look up and Madi is nodding her head towards to Abbey.

"I-uh, wh-what?"

"Do you need a ride?" 

"Yeah, let me text my-my mom."

Hi hello, im shannon and im the author. there will be another update today because this chapter is so short. hope you all are enjoying this<3