Diabolik Lovers

Chapter 17. Painful Truth

I had found the library, during my explorations of the Mukami Mansion. While the Mukami's did have a nice mansion, I learned it wasn't nearly as big as the Sakamakis'. And maybe that was only the case, because the Sakamakis' house was set up to be like a labyrinth. Unless you knew where you were going, it was very easy to get lost. The Mukami Mansion was more...open. If I didn't know any better, I would've never guessed vampires lived here.

It's been a little over two weeks now, since Yui and I began to live under the Mukami mansion. And all the while, I did  what I could to take care of myself, eating when I was able and doing a lot of resting. But, despite my being here by choice, I missed Subaru. And I could only imagine what he was doing. Or even thinking. I hope to God he doesn't hate me for this. The idea of him hating me hurt even more than my illness.

As I read in the library, I sat in an armchair by the fire. A few candles were lit beside me to give me light to read.

"Hey..." Came a voice from behind me. I jolted in the armchair I was sitting in, slamming my book shut. I turned around and was met by Azusa, standing there.

"Oh, jeez, Azusa. Don't scare me like that."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...scare you..." I stood up, turning to him.

"Did you need something?"

"No." He started walking my way, but veered away, as though he was afraid to approach me.

"Azusa?"

"What were you...reading?" His soft voice was so sweet and though most would be frightened by his eerie appearance, he really just looked like someone who needed to be understood. And maybe that's why I wasn't fazed by him.

"I was reading a romance. I'm a bit of a sucker for them." I smiled as I looked down to the book.

"Romance, huh? You like things...like love?"

"Mm-hm."

"What is...love to you?"

"Love is something a person feels and shows to another person they really, really like. But, there are different kinds of love and each kind has a different depth. For instance, I say I love to read books, but it's not the same like when I say I love my sister. I love reading books, because I enjoy them. But, when I say, I love my sister, it's because she and I share a bond. We've grown up together and even have relied on each other as if we were friends. I'm sure you have an idea of that toward Ruki, Yuma, and Kou, right?" He nodded to me, keeping his eyes locked on me.

"And how do you...come to like someone?"

"With time. And getting to know that person."

"Do you...like me...Risa?" I blinked my eyes a few times, a little confused by his question. I searched the words carefully to answer him.

"Well...I don't know you very well, yet, Azusa. But, I don't hate you, if that's what you are asking." Actually, of all the of the brothers, I have had the most contact with Kou. I avoided Yuma at all cost, even though Kou assured me he doesn't hate me for hitting him.

"So, you think...getting to know someone...lets you like them?" Azusa asked.

"Why are you asking me this?"

"Because I...want you...to like me, too. If you like me...you can...hurt me..." My eyes softened.

"Why would you want me to hurt you?"

"Because it...gives me purpose. And if someone...hurts me...that means they will be...happy."

"There are other ways to go about getting to know someone."