Lover

Jotunheim and Rita's

Azriel:

Over the next few weeks, I hadn't been able to train Bella. I had business elsewhere in Prythian, mostly in the mortal world.

But there were the changes in her body, her skin tightening, her stomach flattening, her legs shrinking but starting to gain subtle muscle. And I couldn't help but notice how great her ass looked in the tight skinny jeans she was wearing today.

Mor had gifted her with clothes, Bella out right refused to accept. She said she could get her own, seeing as Rhys seemed to open up an account for her. And she had refused that too but he had threatened her-if she didn't accept her work money, seeing as she was helping in this war, then he would buy her things personally.

So, much to her dismay, she accepted the money. But we all knew she felt as if she didn't deserve it.

There was no progress with finding Sylas. On the late nights I had come back, I would always find Bella pouring over old, ancient books on Gods and portals and magic.

And what shocked me, was that I would always find Amren sitting with her. Usually Amren wouldn't stay at the house unless she was needed, but now that Bella was here, it seemed that she was here all the time. But none of us dare question her.

But Bella seemed pleased to have her as company, though. And because we wanted Bella to be happy, we never mentioned it.

We would always find her in her quiet moments, spending them with Elain. She never really talked to Nesta, but I had a feeling that Nesta was just trying not to feel. She, Feyre and Mor had quickly become best friends. Cassian was still a pain in her ass, and Rhys was encouraging, teaching her the world.

Me? I hardly got to see her, and it killed. I had an idea why, but I just didn't want to admit it. I wasn't good enough, I think everyone knew that. But I was okay with it, I was okay with fucking other women and pretending it was her. But I found myself disliking it, I felt like I wanted to throw up every time I touched someone else. Every time I slid into another woman. And I knew this feeling, I'd felt it when I was in love with Mor for five hundred years.

I never got overly jealous when I saw Cassian and Nesta, Lucien and Elain, Feyre and Rhys. I was glad they were happy, and would put their happiness over mine any day. But I couldn't help but feel envious, because why couldn't I be happy, too?

We stood around a table in the library, Bella was hunched over a book, everyone stood around, watching her. She was talking so fast we almost missed what she was saying.

"I know Sylas too well, he would never go off somewhere without telling me. He had separation anxiety." she explained, eyes wide. I crossed my arms on my chest, my Illyrian leathers keeping me warm in the chilly day.

"But he would go to the ends of the earth to save you, too. He would do anything to get you back." Mor said, brown eyes warm. I looked away, clenching my jaw.

"Yes. He would. And that's why we need to figure this out as soon as possible . . . Pass me that pen and paper?" she asked. Rhys handed it over and she started scribbling, her right hand clutching the pen with determination.

"Sylas mentioned quite a few times that he felt as if he was being watched, but that happens all the time. We're just as fucked up as each other . . . Oh Gods. He was there! That night!" She cried.

She started scribbling again and we all watched in wonder.

"Who was there?" Amren asked softly, standing next to her. I stared at her, trying not to let it show how much I was falling.

"Loki. One morning, Sylas called at three a.m, freaked out. He woke up in a park twenty miles from his house, right next to a drain. He was freaked out because he has never slept walked, I have so I tried to reason with him that maybe it was a once in a while occurrence. Because my mum once slept walked to her best friends house and knocked on their door. But he wasn't convinced. He got home by six a.m." Bella explained, frowning as she continued to write.