I woke up feeling suffocated by a little body. This little girl was sleeping on top of me, wrapped around my body. I didn't want to wake her but it was almost noon and Tamar had planned to be over any second.
I eased from under her and went into the bathroom, where my youngest dog was sleeping. I handled my morning routine and headed downstairs. I sat at the table awhile thinking about what this child might want to eat and if she might be allergic to anything.
I decided to just make breakfast as I usually would. I made cinnamon pancakes, scrambled eggs, and bacon. I set the girl a plate across from where my plate was and dished out one pancake, a small amount of eggs, and two bacon strips.
*ding dong* *ding dong*
I walked to the door and was more than excited when I saw Tamar. "Good morning!" I said happily.
"Its damn near the afternoon, chile," she said before walking past me into the house. "So where is this kid?"
"Wow. Hearing that makes me want to figure out her name even more. It sounds horrible calling her this kid, or that girl..." I said more so to myself. I dozed off into my own world causing Tamar to snap in my face.
"Oh, right. Sorry. She's upstairs sleeping. In my room," I said while pointing upstairs. Tamar walked upstairs and opened the door seeing the little girl cuddling with Marty.
"Aw. She's gorgeous and Marty likes her," Tamar said. Her whole mood changed and she was mesmerized by the girl's beauty, which I myself hadn't even realized til now.
"Yeah. But what are we going to do? I can't keep her..." I reminded her. Before Tamar spoke, the little girl sat up and as she saw me, her eyes watered. "Toni," she cried with her arms out.
I had no clue what to do. It was the first she has spoken, and ironically, it's my name. However, I was stunned by how attached she was getting.
Tamar nudged me to go get her. "I thought you said she doesn't speak?" Tamar asked as I made my way to the girl.
"This is the first thing she's said. Uhm... Are you hungry, sweetie?" I asked looking at the girl, who's face was in the crook of my neck now. She nodded and stopped crying.
"You got a strange one," Tamar said before heading downstairs. "She's just like you when you were younger. Always crying until you were fed," I laughed as I followed behind her.
When we got downstairs, I sat the girl down in front of the food I sat out for her and she began to eat like she hadn't eaten in weeks.
"Slow down, don't stuff your mouth," I said pulling the pancakes out her hands and feeding her myself. "Lord, look at Toni being a mom," Tamar giggled as she ate out my plate.
"The last thing I need is her choking and dying on my watch. This face wasn't made for jail," I joked, slightly. I continued feeding the girl as Tamar asked me questions.
"So, you don't want her, so I think we should take her to the adoption agency and see what they say. I honestly feel like the police wouldn't believe this, and as you said.. that face ain't jail material."
I agreed to the idea. It's the safest and smartest thing to do right now. I can't be charged for kidnapping or be responsible for her. I have a busy life.
I brought the girl upstairs and bathed her. I tried to make her laugh or even smile but she's had the straightest face since last night.
"Okay, sweetie. Let's get you dressed," I said as I took her out the tub and into the guest room. I looked in the drawers for any of my niece's clothes that would fit.
I finally found a jumpsuit and little sweater that fit almost perfectly. I searched for some shoes, luckily finding some white boots that were big on her but they kept her feet covered.
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She looked happy with the clothes so I put her hair up and sent her downstairs with Tamar. That didn't go well because she started crying for me midway through my shower.
"Toniiiiii!" I heard from outside the bathroom door. I quickly finished my shower to see her crying on the floor.
"Hey, listen. The tears have to stop. I am right here, okay?" I said after picking her up. She wiped her tears and nodded. "Well, good. I'm glad you understand." I set her down on the bed and put on a causal outfit in my closet.
When I walked out, she smiled at me so I assume she liked my outfit. "Thank you," I said taking her smile as a compliment.
I picked her back up and headed downstairs. "We're ready," I announced to Tamar who looked beyond ready.
"Okay, let's go see what we can do with her," Tamar said. We left the house and drove to CPS. I admit I was kind of nervous of what they might say.
I was praying I don't have to keep this girl, that'd be the last thing I need. I'm only twenty-two, with a full time job.. I can't raise a little girl. Hopefully this all goes well.
