asset [h.s.]

seventy three // final goodbye

Harry

We drive to the church in complete silence. No music, no radio, no conversation, nothing.

I decide to drive us purely for something to do, Alicia sitting in the passenger seat just in case she begins to feel sick again. I glance over at her from time to time, although she stays in the same position throughout the whole drive, her body turned towards the door as she stares out of the window, her expression blank and emotionless.

After about a 10 minute drive, we eventually arrive at the church. It's in a rather secluded part of town, away from all the noise and bustle of the city. As I pull up outside, I notice it's now beginning to drizzle with rain, the sky overcast and the wind howling through the trees. I guess it's fitting, but I can't help but curse the weather for being so miserable too.

Without a word from any of us, we all climb out of the car and begin making our way up the steps to the church. The priest is waiting for us outside and he greets us all, shaking each of our hands and especially offering his condolences to Alicia, which she thanks him for. Her voice comes out sounding meek and thick, like she's about to cry, so I place my hand on the small of her back as an attempt to comfort her.

The priest then leads us into the church which is fairly empty, a few people littered across the back pews who I assume are part of the parish, because we didn't invite anyone else. Even if we could, I don't even think Alicia has any other family to invite anyway.

As we walk down the aisle to the pews at the front of the church, I notice Alicia shivering slightly with the cold. I reach up to take my jacket off and offer it to her, but she notices what I'm doing and shakes her head, and I reluctantly accept her decline. We finally reach the front of the church and Zayn slides onto the pew first, followed by Liam, then Alicia and I.

Once everyone is settled down, the priest begins the ceremony. He does a few readings and then talks about Richard, about how he's known him ever since he first moved here with his new family, right when Alicia was just a baby and both Richard and Alicia's mother were still young.

When he begins talking about Alicia's mother, I notice her begin to tense slightly from beside me and I slowly reach over to grasp her hand in mine. She shoots me a small smile, gripping onto my hand tightly, although as the service continues, she pulls my hand into her lap and grips onto it with both of her hands, clearly needing the comfort.

"Now," the priest says calmly once we've all finished singing a hymn, which only the old people at the back of the church knew the words to and the four of us somehow muddled through. "I believe that Richard's lovely daughter would like to come up here and say a few words about her father."

The priest looks down at Alicia and I glance sideways at her as she lets out a deep breath, nodding slowly. With a small sniff, she pulls her hands away from mine and slowly stands up from the pew, brushing her dress down a little.

She makes her way to the front of the church, standing in the place where the priest was a few seconds ago. I notice her hands reach out to tightly grip hold of the sides of the pulpit stand like she's trying to stop herself from falling over, letting out another deep breath before her eyes flicker upwards to look at everyone.

"Firstly, I'd just like to thank everyone for coming here today," she begins, her voice still sounding quiet but now slightly amplified due to the small microphone in front of her. "Those of you who did know my dad, those of you who didn't.......I'm sure he'd still appreciate you being here."

She swallows hard, blinking up at the ceiling like she's trying to stop herself from crying. I feel myself tense up as I watch her, hating seeing her stood up there all alone, so exposed and broken. I want nothing more than to just pull her down from there and bring her straight into my arms.