Moonbeams

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Remus was agitated. Caelen didn't need to understand why to recognize it on a normal and this wasn't a normal day, This was the full. He'd been snappish he week leading up to it and the day itself had only become worse, ending with him snapping at her. She'd stared at him with tear filled eyes and went to wait in the bunker for their transformation.

"You don't need to be angry with her," Tonks scolded.

Remus gave her a scathing look. "I'm not angry at her."

"I said I'd spent the night with my parents, what more do you want?" She sighed.

Remus could think of a few things he'd like but didn't see the point in mentioning them again, no one had listened before anyway. "It's not safe," he replied instead.

"So you've said," his wife snapped. "I'll be back first thing, stay safe." She leaned up for a kiss, the action landing just shy of his mouth.

The logical side of Remus told him it would be alright but he couldn't help but worry. He'd loved being able to retain conscious thought throughout the night, being able to be certain he hadn't done and wouldn't do anything unconscionable, and the time spent with best friend and cub. All of that was gone now. Gone with headmaster's death. Gone with Snape's betrayal. He cursed under his breath and trailed slowly down the stairs.

"Hey cub," Remus murmured, settling onto the bottom stair with a tired sigh.

Caelen glanced toward him, forcing a slight smile onto her face, "Hey Daddy. Tonks go?"

He nodded. "I'm sorry, shouldn't have snapped at you."

"You aren't happy," she replied with a shrug.

Remus rubbed his hands over his face with a heavy sigh, "no excuse, in fact that's the worst excuse." He opened his arms, something settling softly back into place when she slammed into him. He grunted slightly from the force and cradled her against him as if she were still the tiny six year old who'd appeared on his doorstep three years prior and not the growing ten year old he now held.

Caelen nuzzled against his chest, curling into him. "Are you scared?" Her small voice murmured after a moment.

"Scared of what, Cub?"

"Losing everyone, being alone."

Remus shut his eyes and held her a little tighter. Part of him felt a good father would insist he wasn't afraid, that he was confident they win and therefore saw no reason to fear. The other part thought it better to be honest, to show his cub that fear was normal and acceptable. "I'm terrified," he whispered. "That's why I fight."

"Wouldn't it be smarter to not fight," the girl muttered, glancing up at him. "If you're scared..."

"I fight because doing something, being able to do something against that which I fear, is the only way to calm those fear," Remus tried to explain. "We've already lost a lot, haven't we Cub?"

The girl nodded, sniffling a bit.

"That is why we have to fight to protect what we have left. Why we have to hold it tightly."

"But you're only holding me?"

Remus chuckled and kissed her cheeks until she giggled. "You are the easiest to get ahold of. The others never listen and go traipsing off merlin knows where."

Caelen would've asked who he meant if the moonlight hadn't landed on her fur in that moment. She transformed, as always, rapidly with only the slightest yelp of surprise as her world shifted.

Remus sighed and placed his cub gently onto the step beside him, noticing how much easier it was for her to reach the next step than it had been, before the moon took over.

Moony snarled and lifted his cub, burying her in their nest of blankets and pacing around the room. He barked sharply when she escaped the fluffy confines and tried to follow, lifting her once more and returning her to the blankets. "Stay Cub," he ordered.

Caelen tilted her head and squirmed free, brushing up against her foreleg. "Aren't we gonna play Daddy?"

"Not this night," he replied and covered her once more with the blanket before resuming his pacing.

The wolf seemed to be mumbling something, cursing someone, or himself, she wasn't sure. Caelen squirmed free again and batted at him. "Come on Daddy, please play?"

Moony sighed and knocked her onto her back in the blankets, snuffling a gust of air onto her belly. The resulting giggles resounding, seemingly in his own head, were well worth the bit of fun and the wolf settled slightly. "Where's the smaller one?"

"The baby?" Caelen questioned, confuses.

This only seemed to darken the wolf's mood and he huffed, settling his jaw along his front paws. "No, between you and I, the not wolf."

"Oh, he's off trying to stop a bad wizard. You're sorta mad at him for it I think."

"I am," he agreed and moved closer to pull his cub between his front paws protectively.

"But he's just trying to help? You did the same?"

The large wolf snorted, as much as a canine is able. "Was angry when it was me too. Go to sleep cub."

Caelen frowned and cuddled into him.

____

As always Remus was the first awake the next morning. He pulled the blankets higher over his little girl's shoulders and slipped into some pajama bottoms. Remus sighed and lay back against his arm, smiling when Caelen squirmed closer to cuddle against him. "Morning cub, night go ok?"

"Daddy why're you mad?"

Remus sighed and wrapped his arm around her. "I'm not so much mad as I am anxious, Cub. Remember that time I was arguing with Snape and you overheard?"

"Which time?" The girl snorted.

Remus smirked and tickled her.

"Ok ok I remember!" She squealed trough her giggles. "The time you regretted me."

"Not you," he corrected the girl quickly.

"You regretted me being like you. You felt guilty. Is that why you're upset? Cuz of the baby?"

"It's a part," he nodded. "You've already has to deal with how people feel about us."

"Tonks isn't Gena Daddy," The girl whispered, cuddling closer.

"Cub," Remus sighed unhappily. "I can't take care of a family of four. Barely managed with just you and I. Now there's Tonks and a baby, still you." He cut himself off suddenly, worried he'd pass his stress onto his daughter.

Caelen tugged the blanket closer and sighed, "you think too much Daddy."

Remus snorted and kissed her head.

_________

As always I'm super sorry for the wait guys. Hope you enjoyed it 💙💙💙

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