The Purist / DRAMIONE (COMPLETE)

The Ferret Fiasco

Hermione, after her run-in with Malfoy, had to put up with him in Arithmancy too, continually elbowed as she sat to the left of him, and his left hand scribbled fiercely in a messy scrawl, like something she'd see Ron do. Malfoy must have been upset; his writing was normally neat and incredibly small, a slanted, italic script. Today, however, it was all over the place. Hermione put her pen down and raised her hand.

"Miss Granger?" Professor Vector lifted her head wearily.

"I've finished, professor," Hermione replied politely, feeling Malfoy's eyes glare into the back of her head. She remembered wondering if he could see into her mind; how she felt slightly guilty for immediately stereotyping his character. But it was true, he stereotyped her.

Professor Vector was staring at her. Malfoy was eyeing her curiously, the glare gone. She noted the absence of the scratching of quills. The professor looked at her interestedly.

"I said, when you've finished, kindly complete exercise five. There will be no homework; I expect you'll all manage to get that done before the end of the lesson."

"Oh." Hermione went red. "I'm sorry, professor."

"That's quite all right Miss Granger."

Hermione could now sense both the professor and Malfoy looking at her as she examined exercise five, her face burning. Luckily no-one else was; the scratching of quills had returned. When the bell went, she pasted a smile on her face, packed her satchel and left the classroom to find Ron and Harry.

"Lots of homework?" She said brightly, catching up with the boys. "Professor Vector didn't give us any at all!"

"Well, bully for Professor Vector," Ron said moodily.

The three of them reached the Entrance Hall, joining the queue for dinner when a loud voice rang out.

"Weasley! Hey, Weasley!"

It was Malfoy, who glared at Hermione as he passed her, and Crabbe and Goyle were with him too, all of them looking thoroughly pleased about something.

"What?" Ron snapped.

"Your dad's in the paper, Weasley!" Malfoy brandished a copy of the Daily Prophet, and was speaking very loudly so everyone in the Entrance Hall could hear. "Listen to this!"

After reading a section of the paper, Malfoy looked up.

"Imagine them not even getting his name right, Weasley, it's almost as though he's a complete nonentity, isn't it?" He crowed.

Everyone in the Entrance Hall was listening now. Malfoy half glanced in her direction and Hermione now had no doubt that he was mocking her about earlier that day. He straightened the paper with a flourish, and read on to the end.

"And there's a picture, Weasley!" Malfoy shouted, flipping the paper over and holding it up. "A picture of your parents outside their house – if you can call it a house! Your mother could do with losing a bit of weight, couldn't she?"

Harry came to Ron's rescue as Ron was shaking so hard he couldn't speak.

"Get stuffed, Malfoy," said Harry. "C'mon, Ron..."

"Oh yeah, you were staying with them this summer, weren't you, Potter?" Malfoy sneered. "So tell me, is his mother really that porky, or is it just the picture?"

Hermione thought Malfoy had a lot of nerve if he dared to say something so cruel about kind Mrs Weasley and so inwardly applauded Harry when he retorted, "you know your mother, Malfoy?" While clutching the back of Ron's robes with Hermione to stop Ron launching himself at Malfoy. "That expression she's got, like she's got dung under her nose? Has she always looked like that, or was it just because you were with her?"

Malfoy went slightly pink. "Don't you dare insult my mother, Potter."

"Keep your fat mouth shut, then," Harry said while turning away.

BANG!

Hermione had seen Malfoy raise his wand, thought Harry too would've seen the triumphant look in Malfoy's eyes as he prepared to fire the hex at Harry's face; the screams that preceded the blow would've alerted anyone but clearly not Harry, who made to grab his wand, only something else happened. Professor Moody intervened, in a huge rage.

"OH NO YOU DON'T, LADDIE!"

A white ferret was shivering on the stone-flagged floor, exactly where Malfoy had been standing. Moody bounced the ferret up and now; its squeals becoming louder as it flew higher and higher. Professor McGonagall descended the marble staircase, books in her arms. When Moody informed her of Malfoy's disposition as a ferret, the books spilled out of her arms and she transfigured Malfoy back again.

Draco Malfoy reappeared, lying in a heap on the floor with his sleek blond hair all over his now brilliantly pink face. He got to his feet, wincing. Moody seized Malfoy's arm and hauled him away to the dungeons, to inform Snape of his offense. McGonagall stared anxiously after them for a few moments, then waved her wand again causing the fallen books to soar up and into her arms. The trio proceeded into the Great Hall, where they sat down at the Gryffindor table. Ron had a strange look on his face.

"Don't talk to me," he said quietly.

Hermione looked at him in surprise. She had been thinking about Malfoy's revenge and was taken aback. "Why not?"

"Because I want to fix that in my memory forever," Ron replied, eyes closed. "Draco Malfoy, the amazing bouncing ferret..."

Both Harry and Hermione laughed, Hermione rather forcefully, and to cover it up, began doling beef casserole onto each of their plates.

"He could have really hurt Malfoy, though," she said without thinking. Harry just stared at her. "It was good, really, that Professor McGonagall stopped it_"

"Hermione!" Ron's eyes snapped open as he said furiously, "You're ruining the best moment of my life!" Hermione made an impatient noise and began to eat at top speed.

"Don't tell me you're going back to the library this evening?" Harry asked, watching her suspiciously.

"Got to," Hermione answered thickly through a mouthful of food. "Loads to do."

"But you told us Professor Vector_"

"It's not schoolwork," Hermione interrupted in a final sort of way and departed in under five minutes, leaving behind a clean plate.