Mad and In Love (Male!Alice X Reader)

The Effort Does Not Garuntee The End

You decided to spend today just chatting, observed by your step dad of course. He showed you a few drawings he made while you were gone.

"What a beautiful dress...She almost looks like she's about to be married..." You mentioned.

"The white queen...She's been quite ill recently. A shame really, the king says she's as beautiful as the dresses tailored for her. I have never seen her for her veil."

You nodded, observing that most of her face was obscured by the white lace.

"She sounds lovely. Maybe one day we will both see her face."

"(Y/n).." His doctor coughed, silently asking for a word.

You nodded to him, "When I come back I should tell you about this letter I received not a few days go...For now, I really should speak with my fa-"

"No!"

He tightened his grip on you making you gasp at the pressure on your limb.

"Alan!"

He saw your scared eyes and immediately let you go.

"Just go...GO!"

You backed away, eyes trained on him as he stood entirely frustrated. Why does he keep hurting you? It's the last thing he wants to do but he does it. It drove him insane. If he can't stop himself from hurting you, what's to say he couldn't help himself but to watch his parents burn...And his Sister...Maybe he secretly enjoyed the sounds of their agony and only pretends to be upset by it...No he genuinely was torn up about it but...It was his fault, his fault...He should have died with the rest of them...He should have died a number of times in Rutledge...Why didn't he? Why does he continue to try..?

"What do you mean he's rubbed off?!"

"(Y/n), Darling...It's already going around that you read far too much and come here far too often. A great many respectable families have already stopped giving you invitations to parties, not only because you constantly deny them, but they believe you mad...Even impossible to marry..."

"Whimsical rumors at best. Besides, perhaps I fill nicely as a lonely old maid."

"Most certainly not!"

Your heated glare did not phase through him as this settled things. Yes you were his stepdaughter but this was your future.

"I will ask again...Do you love Alan Liddell?"

You hesitated. You had still yet to settle things. Your feelings were as jumbled as Alan's mind...You didn't want to admit love, especially to someone so fragile...While the feeling was love you refused to act upon it for fear that Alan was set in his delusions, never to really see you or love you, but love a figment of his mind over you. The fear was real and settled uncomfortably in your gut.

"I...I can't say..."

"Then, as requested by my superior, perhaps you should take a very long holiday."

"But-!"

"From London."

You were shocked and looked at the door to Alan's room. You could hear him growing more upset. Your attention was drawn back to your father.

"(Y/n) listen...He'll be fine...It's what's best for the both of you until you can understand your feelings and he can piece together his mind."

You looked down realizing...What if...You were hold him back...Just by being here...
It tore you apart...Your mind was beginning to understand the importance of leaving but refused the idea becoming reality...Truly you didn't ever want to leave him alone. He should never be alone.

"(Y/n)...You understand don't you?"