The Songs I Sing

Chapter 4

Nightmares plagued me through the night and into my morning. I was sweaty and breathing like I had an asthma attack.

When I was young, this girl ran past our house. She stopped to lean over taking shallow breaths. Mother ran out to meet her only to catch her as she fell over. The ambulance had to come get her since her heart almost stopped from the palpitations.

I never wanted to go through what she had to. Only the thing was, I was. There was a creak as my door opened to reveal Joshua coming in. What was he doing in here?

"Hey, it's going to be okay," he whispered in my ear. "Tell me what your dream was about."

"Rachel was strapped to a board. Guards threw knives at her pretending it was a game. I was there; I rescued her and Antonio. Antonio was being stoned right next to her. There was laughing all over. It wouldn't stop; she just wouldn't stop laughing at their demise." A sob escaped from me before I went on. Joshua hugged me from behind me. "Once they were free, we were on the road. I tried to talk to them but they just ignored me. Everything I did never got their attention. Mom and dad came up behind me. They told me one thing, 'why would they hear me if I didn't hear their screams and pain?' Am I never going to find them? Will they hate me forever because I left them? Here I am living a nice life while they're being tortured."

"I think you're being hurt in your own way. See how you have these terrible nightmares? Just because you have people here with you doesn't mean that you're living any better than them. I think God's going to give you just as many hardships because he believes you can overcome them. He wants you to become the best woman you can be."

We sat there for a while before he left so I could get ready for breakfast. I needed to start walking in ten minutes otherwise I would be late. Joshua decided to give me a piece of toast and we made our way on the path.

He commented about how the path needed to be trimmed a bit. I think he was feeling a little awkward with what happened earlier. The nervousness was overcoming my awkwardness. No words could come out of my mouth so I just let him blab on.

I left him at the path thinking that it would be so much better if he was there with me. My gut told me today was going to be harder than yesterday.

I got to English before the 1st bell even rang. Some other students were in here as well but the teacher was missing. Maybe, she had something to do.

There was a tap on my shoulder from one of the girls I recognized. I think she was the one glaring at others who wanted to talk to me. She pushed me away from the desks when a male walked up to it.

I didn't retaliate as they rummaged through my bag. Mother taught me that retaliation against aggressive people will only do harm.

They grabbed my homework folder with their nasty little fingers. The girl pulled out my essay I spent working on last night; it was due today since it was just supposed to be three paragraphs. She smiled her poisonous look and strutted off with it leaving the male to glare at me.

"It's not my fault if she gets a bad grade," I muttered to him before sitting down. I had three minutes to redo the assignment which wasn't going to be possible.

The teacher walked in when I was half way through my second paragraph. Slowly, I placed it back into the folder. I couldn't give it to her unfinished so I'll just have to give it in late. Although the late penalty was 10% off the first day, it would be worse turning it in now.

We began to work on our morning prompts when she came to the desks to take our homework. By the time she got to my desk, I was able to finish the morning work.

"Homework?"

I shook my head no while looking at my desk.

"Turn it into me after class," she sighed with a disappointed look. This wasn't how I wanted to start things out.