I Don't Wanna Live Forever

Chapter 17

A/N: Thank you for all of your support and for letting me share this with you all. We have reached the end of this story... but nothing truly ends now does it? Thank you for bearing with my horrible writing and infrequent posting. You guys are wonderful. I'm sorry for the way this ends ;) xx

TRIGGER WARNING: Suicide and mentions of suicide.

No one's PoV (written by Grace aka destielsdreamer )

Mick, Ketch and Grace had turned into fine young soldiers. They obeyed every command and had even managed to recruit a new member: Brianna Ketch. As far as Doctor Hess was concerned, they were all fully trained. They had completed every task. They had passed every test. Except one. Only one out of the four had obeyed the final test. And after today, only one other of her four initiates could say they too had obeyed.
"So, you must be wondering why I called the two of you here today." Doctor Hess said to Grace and Ketch who were stood in front of her. They both couldn't remember the last time they had been summoned to her office, and were wondering why there was a sheet of tarpaulin covering the polished wooden floor.
Hess looked at them both nervously before continuing. She didn't want to have to do this, but the Code demands it and she of all people couldn't disobey it.
"We have to make sure that every person working for us will follow the code and execute orders without question." She began. Ketch and Grace looked at each other in confusion.
"Which is why." She continued, walking over to a table where something was wrapped in a brown cloth. She opened it to reveal a gun.
"Only one of you will be leaving this room. Good luck." Hess says before walking hastily out of the room, looking neither of them in the eye. This was the final test, to kill the person that means the most to you. And there is no exceptions.
"Well do it then."
Grace unwrapped the cloth and placed the gun in his hand.
"No!" He shouted, throwing the gun back onto the table in anger. "I'm not going to let you die!"
"You have to. Just pick it up. It'll all be over soon." She said gently. "You're the bravest, most intelligent person I've ever known. You have to be the one to continue."
Ketch held her face in his hand, trying to stop himself from crying.
"No, I'd rather die than see you get hurt."
"Please, just end this now. I hate to see you like this." Grace says quietly.
Ketch stared down at the gun like it was on fire. Like it was the most horrific monster he had ever faced. He couldn't bring himself to touch it, let alone shoot the girl he loved with it.
"I can't. I can't do it. I can't live without you. You're the only humanity I have left." He says, brushing her hair away from her tear-stained eyes. She looked at him sadly before intertwining her fingers with his.
"You can. I know you can. You're the best man I've ever known. You're my hero."
"I'm not a hero. I'll never be anything special. But you...you really are something special. That's why I can't let you do this." Ketch says, turning slightly so he is standing in front of the table so Grace can't reach the gun.
"Never say that again. You're the bloody reason that the British Men of Letters are still thriving. I couldn't imagine my time here without you by my side." Grace says, with a new sureness in her voice. Ketch barely even noticed this as he hugged her tightly, only letting himself cry when she couldn't see him.
She knew what she had to do. Slowly, she reached behind him until her fingers took a hold of the gun.
(WARNING STARTS HERE!)
"Please forgive me." She whispered in his ear.
"Forgive you for wha-" Ketch began to ask but Grace had already pulled away from him and had the gun pressed to the side of her head.
"Since you won't do it, I think it's best if I spare us both the agony don't you?" She smiles at him, staying calm. Ketch lets out a horrified sob and runs towards her but she puts her arm out, not letting him take the gun from her.
"No stop this, stop whatever you're playing at right now! You won't do this!" Ketch cries, panic rising to his throat.
"Hey, hey, it's all okay baby. Just don't come any closer, please. You can't be at risk." She says, pressing the gun firmly into her temple. "Remember our first date, you remember don't you? How amazed I was at how good you looked. Remember our first night together?" She smiled fondly at the memory.
"I remember it all."Arthur Ketch remembered everything to the very last detail. He could write their story like a book. These memories flashed before his eyes as he remembered the first time he ever saw her, and the point at which he fell for her. He remembered all of their sleepless nights and all of their crazy adventures. Every moment down to the last detail. He would have given the world just to go back and relive them all again. It made him think, you never realise how perfect a life is until it slips through your fingers. He reached out to grab the gun again, but Grace just stepped further backwards, still preventing him from coming anywhere near it.
"Then I want you to hold onto those memories. Hold them and never let go. Can you do that for me?" Grace asked, her voice cracking.
"Of course." Ketch whispered, forcing a smile.
"Thank you. Thank you for making my life an amazing journey." She said, smiling back at him.
"Stop talking like this! Just hand me the gun, we will think of another way!" He shouted, reaching for her arm. Instead of backing away, she put her other hand on his shoulder and kissed him softly.
"There is no other way." She said softly.
"But Grace, I-"
"I love you, Arthur Ketch." She whispered, before letting him go.