Love Struck | ✓

HAPPINESS

C H A P T E R
E I G H T E E N

E L E N A H A R T

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GAZING FROM AFAR like a young teenage girl would ogle at her celebrity crush, I sighed, a dimming frown spreading across my glossy lips.

"You know-" Came Alissa's amused voice, her index finger poking my arm as she quirked a small grin. "-staring like that won't do you any good." Scoffing at her words, I lowered my gaze.

"I can't help it." I groaned into the palm of my hands. "The more I try to look away or avert my thoughts elsewhere, I end up staring at him even more openly and thinking about him even more often. It's useless." Shaking her head, Alissa rolled her eyes.

She pulled her leg over the bench, straddling it as she faced me. "So why are you trying to push these feelings away? For someone who's meant to be an expert in love, you have no idea what you're doing!" Alissa spoke with a stern voice and eyes that followed my every move.

Glancing at her, taking into account the way her blue eyes welled with curiosity, I licked my lips and nodded towards Sebastian and Loren. "Look at him." Was all I said before Alissa complied and did what I'd asked.

Following my eyes, Alissa watched what I was seeing. "He's happy." My frown had disappeared and it no longer existed. Instead, a small smile had replaced it.

"Look." She began. "I get that he's happy and everything- but I don't think- I just-" Pausing to reevaluate her words, she sucked in a deep breath. "The only problem I see with this is that you're not happy." Her lips pulled into a straight line instantly as she'd noticed the way my expression had dimmed.

Sighing for the hundredth time today, I looked back to see Sebastian lost in his thoughts. "When you feel deep things for someone, all you care about is making them happy. And look at him over there- smiling. He's happy. And that's what I want. So if being with Loren keeps him that way, then I'll forget about myself for a while. Because what I want is for him to have that look- the one right there on his face. And I'll do anything to keep it like that. Because that's how much I care about him."

Alissa stared at me, the curiosity had vanished and replacing it almost instantly was a look of sorrow. "Forget about what I said." She began.

"You really do know what you're talking about." Smiling at the way she'd understood where I came from, I rested against the tabletop.

"But." She started. That one word had me rolling my eyes. "I get that you want him to be happy. And I get that that's what you want." Pushing myself from the table, I watched Alissa, waiting in anticipation for what she had to say.

"But him being with someone that's not you. Is that what you need."

Before I could even think about her question, a new presence had made itself known. Placing an arm over my shoulder, Colin slid into the seat next to me, smiling down at my confused expression as it took a moment for me to realise who'd joined us.

Smiling at him softly, I spoke up. "Hey." Grinning right back at me, his eyes lit up.

•••••••

S E B A S T I A N S T O N E

I COULDN'T STAND the sight of Colin and Elena. It caused a painful burning sensation to brew within my chest. My eyes narrowed at the two from across the hall as I stared in discontent.

"What's wrong?" Came a light and gentle voice, followed by a small pressure on my arm as dainty fingers wrapped around it, squeezing softly to gain my full attention.

Humming, I averted my gaze to Loren. Forcing myself to look away when a part of me fought back and refused to do so, but I'd managed. "Hm?" I asked, taking in the way her blue eyes shone as they wandered across my face.

Quirking a thin lipped smile, Loren removed her hand. "You seem distracted. That's all." She replied.

Shifting my gaze as I leaned back, I drummed my fingers against the tables surface. "Sorry." I replied, unsure of what to say.

It was true. I was distracted. And it became such an easy habit of mines whenever Elena was around or in my sight. I couldn't help but want to look at her or talk to her or allow my head to become filled with thoughts of her.

I couldn't get her off my mind.

The purpose of this whole charade was for me to get rid of my 'heartbreaking' ways. And she thought I was successful. But it was far from the truth.

In reality, Loren would indefinitely end up heartbroken, or at least hurt.

In the beginning, Elena was convinced that she'd find me the perfect girl. And she was crazy about the idea of a perfect relationship and all that followed.

She wouldn't stop until she found me the perfect girl. So I made her think that she did.

Loren was amazing. To someone else, she probably was perfect. But to me? In my eyes? Only one girl could fit that word.

And it wasn't Loren.

Gazing at Elena once again, I watched as she conversed with Colin, a grin stretching across her lips as she did so.

She was happy.

The fact that she was happy with another guy that wasn't me pained me. But I couldn't do anything about it. I could take something she'd dreamt of away from her because of my wants and desires.

It just wouldn't be fair.

She'd always go off on rants and babble on about how she wanted a perfect this and a perfect that.

I loved to sit and listen to her because talking about love was the very thing she lived and breathed for.

The thing was, Elena had this fairytale dream that usually appeared in storybooks that ended with 'happily ever after'- embedded into her mind.

But it was a dream that I wasn't apart of, because I wasn't perfect.

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So exams are finally over! Which means I get to update more often yay!

Left a little surprise with the change up of POV and now you know how Sebastian really feels. Thoughts?