Steam (Kleinsen)

Jared

I woke up with my arms around Evan, our hair still mixing as we laid on the floor. I stared at the beautiful boy, not wanting to get up. I decided to at least stretch my legs, which led me to the bathroom. My mind flitted back to my usual morning routine, and I searched through the mirror cabinet for razor blades. When I couldn't find any, I shut the cabinet with rage. I blanked out and grabbed a bathbomb from a basket next to the tub. Walking back into the bedroom, I tossed the bathbomb onto the bed and threw a random fireball at the wall, annoyed. I watched it diminish into a puff of smoke as it hit the wall. I smiled. I continued to throw fireballs at the wall, watching them disappear into dark grey smoke as they hit the sky blue wall...

My room had grey walls. I suddenly remembered it was Evan's room, in Evan's house. I looked down to see Evan staring at me wide eyed. I destroyed the fire that built up around my hands. "Sorry, Ev." I said, grabbing the bathbomb and dropping down next to him. "It's fine." He said. I looked at the purple and white bathbomb in my hands. I looked at Evan's hair. I picked my hand up and placed the bathbomb in his hair. "Gah! Jared, that takes weeks to filter out!"

I looked up to see his hair turning a beautiful lavender color. My face heated up slightly as I admired his hair. I laughed at how angry he looked with his hair turning a soft pastel color. "Why'd you do that?!" He practically shrieked. "Because it's fun." I said simply. Evan tried holding his anger, but soon erupted into a fit of giggles. We fell onto the bed, gasping for air through our laughs. "Oh god, Jared." Evan said, still giggling slightly. "W-why'd you do that?"

"I wanted to see what would happen." Evan shook his head slightly. "Only you, Jared. Only you."

I waved goodbye to Evan and left, with Heidi already at work. I started walking, already dreading a confrontation between Jace and I. I opened the door of my house to be greeted by emptiness. On one hand I was relieved Jace wasn't here. On the other, I wasn't surprised at all by the lack of life at the house. I walked into my room and closed the door, locking it as well. I opened my closet and stepped inside, where I was greeted by a gay pride flag, a pan pride flag, and a keyboard. I sat on the stool that was in front of the piano and closed the closet door.

Plugging in my headphones, I rested my fingers on the keys. This was my alternative to cutting. Of course, I could get in so much more trouble for it, but I loved it. I started with simple chords, escalating to melodies of impossible speeds. My mind turned to mush; nothing was going on in my head anymore. My fingers flew across the keyboard, ending the song dramatically.. It was so satisfying ending the song like that. Insane and dramatic. I loved it. i relished the feeling for a little longer, until I grew hungry.

By the time I'd reached the kitchen, it was 7:00pm. I pulled out some trader Joe's dumplings from the freezer and held them over my head for a bit. After they warmed up a bit, I walked to my room and laid down on my bed, the dumplings in my lap. I wish life were this simple. Me, in my bed, with dumplings in my lap. No one's screaming at me. No fear of burning anything. Just the simplest things of life. This is why I'm still alive. Yet it's also why I'm on the verge of death.

Oh god I have't published in so long sorry about that but it's winter break so I'll try to update more! Vote, comment, follow, whatever bros. Thanks!
-Ares