Nazım

Avutmak// consolation

I tried making this one a little longer than usual sooooOOoooOOOo here it is?

A V U T M A K

[consolation]

It was no joke that history seemed to be repeating itself with Nazım and Nesrin. Especially the latter. Ever since that night they had gotten back from the party, Nesrin hadn't gone to school and stayed cooped up in her bedroom under the guise that she was sick and just needed some bed rest. The rest of the household seemed to buy it, but not Nazım.

He didn't step foot into that room for those few days. The last time he had seen her was the sight of her going into her room and not coming back out of it. And he saw no purpose in going there anyway, since Nazım couldn't console anyone even if he tried. It surely didn't work on Nesrin that night. She would have killed herself anyway.

While kicking a ball with Murat by the docks one day, Nazım was overtaken by his thoughts. He couldn't even enjoy a game he loved playing with his little brother. Murat didn't seem to notice as he giggled and picked up the red ball.

"Nazzu!" he called.

Nazım looked up from staring at the ground beneath him and saw Murat a few meters away, standing in front of him. Murat tossed the ball and Nazım easily caught it while it was at its zenith. He then tossed it lightly to Murat, but felt something strange inside him once he saw it land.

It started to roll, further, and Nazım stood there, motionless with his arms to his side and his expression blank as he saw Murat chase after it. The ball rolled to the edge of the dock, where the black waters crashed against each other, violently, and Nazım suddenly found himself running after him.

"Murat!" he shouted. "Stop!"

Even though Murat wasn't close to the edge, Nazım had some sort of idea that Murat could have slipped into the water trying to grab the ball and drowned, all while he watched. And he would've died.

To his pleasure, the boy stood up and stood in place as he waited for Nazım to come. Once he did, Nazım took the ball and Murat's hand. He them started walking them away from the fishermen, the docks, and more importantly, the water. It was unbearable to have to deal with in the winter.

"Nazzu, why are we going?"

"Uh--I found a better place in Teyze Fatma's yard."

"But she said if we break something, she'll break us!"

Sometimes it was hard to keep his patience with Murat. Or little children in general. Children seemed to always like asking why or why not, which always bothered Nazım, because of what benefit would it be to the child to ask that?

But then, he would realize, that was him when he was Murat's age.

Nazım opened the gate to his aunt's yard and they both went inside. The unique thing about her yard was that it was surrounded by a thick growth of plants or bushes so it was a sort of seclusion, or privacy from any passing people.

"We'll play in here."

"Okay," Murat said.

He kicked the ball to Murat, who picked it up and said, "can we get Nessy to play too?"

"I don't think she's in the mood. She's sick."

Murat frowned. "I don't want her to be sick."

"You and me both."

"Ooh, Nazzu, how about we play that fish game with those cards Baba got from Ankara?"

"Take me to them," Nazım smiled a half smile and followed Murat inside. Murat went up the stairs, and Nazım had to slow his pace. Then, Murat stopped at the top. "Wait here." he said, and walked into the right door.