The Impact Of Her: GirlXGirl (D/s)

Walking Away From Her

PAST

Phoenix

The harsh beat of electric music thrummed through the Pleasure room as I entered with my beautiful girl on my arm, her wide, blue eyes taking everything in as if it would be her last time here.

It wasn't that she had never attended a sex club before, to the contrary, I took her to many before this night. No, the reason she was so shell shocked by all of this was because before, I'd kept to the safer rooms of the clubs I'd brought her to, only allowing her to watch shows that I knew kept extreme bondage and punishment to a bare minimum. I wasn't sure if she was ready to see everything, but after taking her to my own room at home, where I tied her up, teased her well into dawn before finally letting her have the exquisite peak of orgasm; I knew she was as ready for my lifestyle as she may ever be.

So, tonight was the night.

"Say the word, baby girl. And we'll go." Her eyes found mine, then just as her hand lifted to cup my cheek with a gentle, yet sure touch. I heard a few gasps around the busy room, the knowledge that I was allowing a woman to touch me freely was almost unheard of. In my experience with domination and submission, control was the most important thing when it came to maintaining the balance between looking after the girl in my care and assuring her outmost respect and obedience to me; in all things, even outside of the bedroom.

Yet, with Haley, those rules didn't apply. Because I could be ravaging her, teasing her, using her body for my own needs and keeping her from pleasure for days at a time and yet, with one simple look, one singular touch? She had all the control. A control over me no other girl had before her.

The power to hurt me.

"I don't want to go anywhere without you, Fy. You're my safe place." Leaning my face deeper into the touch of her warm palm, I nodded, a ghost of a smile reaching my lips.

"You don't know how much that means, baby. But I'll find a way to show you." It was her that smiled, then and I swear to every God out there, it lit up the entire damn room.

"I want to-" Her thoughts were cut off as a blonde head of hair popped out from between a pair of long, tanned legs across the room and called out my girls name.

What the...

"Haley! I didn't know you were a member here. God, how are you?" The man bound around the bondage horse he had his supposed lover attached to and left her there to pull Haley from my arms and straight into his. I made a feeble sound of protest but, in all honesty, I wasn't about to stop their little exchange. He was shirtless from the waist up and he was just the type of man I was sure I'd be attracted to if I wasn't so surely into women. Always had been, even before I knew the meaning behind the word gay.

My Hales, though was Bi-curious, and though I accepted that for who she was and had no qualms against her exploring her sexuality in a safe, consensual way, I also demanded complete honesty and loyalty from her, which she gave me in spades.

I knew she wouldn't do anything with him, at least not without speaking to me about it first.

But fuck, I saw it. In that moment, as I watched her look up at him with a mixture of surprise and attraction, I wanted so badly to tell myself I was just seeing things out of some irrational jealousy caused by the fact that he was almost naked and still had the remnants of another woman's taste on his mouth. It should have repelled the girl in front of me from him, knowing that he didn't care that his partner was naked, bound by her wrists and ankles to a bondage horse all the way across the room, with eyes of other men watching her, wanting to take her in such a vulnerable, unprotected state.

I knew they wouldn't. I knew that for sure because of the Code Of Conduct each member was asked to sign before signing their membership agreement. It stated that they would act rationally, sanely and respectfully, towards all members, even during a scene of either pain or pleasure. The knowledge that my Haley was drawn to this man had me stumbling back a step while reaching for the car keys in back of my pocket, sudden bile rising up in my throat as I saw the truth playing out right in front of my own eyes.

I wasn't enough for her.

This was what I had been dreading, since the beginning.

Since meeting her, I knew she had that curiosity, how would it be being with a man? How would it be different than all the ways I teased, tormented and loved her? But god damn it! I loved her.

How could she look elsewhere?

Was she better off without me?

And with every step I took away from her, I told myself she was.

Somehow, someway I had to be, too.